The waiter, a tired looking bespectacled Asian man, turned his head. "I don't want this stuff. I want the stuff you eat when all the white people leave." The waiter smiled and

D0nt U H@t3 wh3N ppl Tw@lK l!k3 Th!S haha

Well, at least I thought it would be like that. I was never quite sure of how unsure I really was. In fact, the only thing I've ever been sure of was cheese. Cheese was my passion.

"It's kind of weird, but you can't really help that the disease is going around," said former queen

He slept under the covers for the first time since the ghost had been busted. That moment where he'd felt safe under the covers, then seen a ghost beneath had ruined his safe place

The freakin' snow was up to my crotch, not that I minded the stimulation, but I needed to get to the meet her. She had left a chat on my phone and I was intrigued. All it said

I remember being born, which I guess is pretty rare. Everyone always wants me to tell them about it, but the truth is childbirth is not pretty. Do you want to know? Okay, fine:

"Mr. White, are you stil with us? Oh no, he's losing to much blood! We need a medic! Jones aid the the left bunker while i go get help," yelled Price. All of the sudden, a grenade

There was a girl who loved to go shopping. Everyday when she got home from school she would get her purse and go to the mall. She never wore the same outfit. Her only problem was

Paper stacks twisted to the ceiling like MC Escher stairs in Social Worker Suzie's office. She nursed a frappucino. Her next appointment burst in. It was the Minotaur, he was

I followed the hot chick for two blocks and finally got up the nerve to ask her out when she entered a biker bar. I hesitated and then entered. Everyone turned to stare

Until a year ago he owned his father’s pawn shop but left it to deal in anything-you-want from a shop with no address. I saw him walk behind the police car and light

if your happy an u no it clap ur hands (clap_clap) if you happy an u no it clap ur hands (clap_clap) if ur happy and u noe it and ur face will surely show it if ur happy an u no it

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No one thinks I am smart but they are wrong. They just see a guy behind the video rental counter and think, dropout. But I am smart. And I know all their little foibles and

Five minutes into the day she had that sinking feeling. She knew she had hired the wrong person. No more Gen Ys she promised herself. She should have seen it coming when

Drama happens everyday. Today,

It had been a long night at yoga practice. As I stepped into the street a violent ravaged dog attack my leg. I kicked in scream until I beat it off.

An old saggy hag was running through the street naked as can be running into a stop sign with a draft causing her breasts to smack her in the face.

So your mother is so old she Dj-ed at the Boston Tea Party