Dr Crud made his first incision with a scapel into the little girl's chest only to discover the patient was filled with sugar and spice and all things nice. Amy's twin brother need

I climbed over the balcony noiselessly...tiptoed to the sliding glass doors and slipped in...a single silent mission on my mind. I had come to steal the artichoke dip.

"Fractals et my dingo," Gareth said bitterly as his Romanesque apartment building started to look like a congress of trilobites. "Wasn't me, bro," said his friend Corwin with conce

Mia wrote out daily schedules solely for the thrill of scribbling over them. As an agent of minor chaos, such was her way of life. Unfolding a sock could start a chain reaction of

He felt a void inside his chest the day she said she wanted nothing to do with him anymore.As he fucked many women (and a few guys) in orther to forget her,it was not working.Sex

when i was younger i used to shove sand up my nose and snails in my ears. what do you expect? i was raised by a family of

I don't care what He says. When the computer voice is singing in Daft Punk's "Up All Night," it sounds like it's singing, "we'll rub a Mexican lucky."

"She sure is living the part today!" though the Great Mesmero, as he sawed his screaming wife in half before an awestruck audience. What a terrific illusion it was! "Darling", he w

The little clown was not happy. His makeup was running, his big red nose had lost it's string and he no longer felt like his chosen profession was something worth the effort.

"Our soup of the day is sour neck in a hyperglycemic broth. Any takers?" I grabbed my daughter and bolted. They should serve American food in Transylvania. Tourists deserve

Acme delivered the death ray the next day. Inside, however, there was only a toilet plunger and a small pamphlet entitled "So You've Bought Your First Death Ray". Wile E. was not

The stain on THAT bed? The one next to the poster? Well, let's just say. Wait a second, should I be telling you this? Do you have clearance? Let me see your teeth. Hmmm.

once apon a time an assassin by the name of ellie Thurman was delivered the task of capturing and killing Justin Bieber, after that she had to kill again. Connor Maynard

The stench of drunken lowlives drifted through the tavern, drenching everything in a mist of putrid scents. Corran sat in the back, keeping an eye on everything. So far, nothing.

Every Tuesday, after I watch reruns of "Keeping Up With The Wests," I get a lesson in plagiarism-sorry-sampling from Johann Sebastian Kanye. Kanye says I got no rhythm-what does

A great deal of confusion could certainly have been avoided if the organizers of the inaugural skin cancer prevention awareness gala hadn't titled the conference: ForSkin!

Is there anyone out there who can help me write a surrealist poem?

Was there a way out? The tunnel seemed to go on forever. The wolf sniffed anxiously at a pile of logs left abandoned on the tiled floor. It wanted

Personally I think this is very weird. Sitting here waiting for someone to add to a story is time-consuming. Let's make this story interesting. I'm starting it with one word, door.

Sarah lifted the cube from the ground. It glowed a faint orange. Where had this mysterious artifact come from. Suddenly, the cube began to make a strange sound.