To be one with the Tao is to be in balance with the dual polarities of your nature. One must be in flow with the universe. Which is why I have trouble with stop lights.

Dirk was so attached to Christine that when she met an untimely end in a car accident, he was heartbroken. At the funeral in the junkyard (he called it the car cemetery) his eulogy

"Do you like my new frock?" she asked. "Do you want the long or the short answer?" he replied. "Oh, long please!" she said fetching a notebook and sharp pencil. "Well, the bias cut

Josiah had been a zombie for several years before a friend recommended lavender bath salts. They made him feel calm yet zesty. Sometimes he felt like dancing, but his remaining leg

and the paper got replaced. Meanwhile

They say they can't take it with you... so I had it bronzed.

Rolie Polie Olie got out of bed, brushed his teeth, and recharged his head.

"Smell my finger madame," said the Scottsman to Ms. Marple. He extended his meaty index finger. The nail looked a bit dirty, as if there was some kind of cheese under it.

I'm frightened by what is now being called the posthuman condition. Before genetic enhancement therapies were the norm, we could always blame the human condition, or god...now we

The mountains parted ahead, it was the last line of land before the sea. Atokata loomed above them glittering in the sun as a giant beetle. The arcology that I would soon call home

“Oh, how fun!” said Denise as she read the flyer for the Midwives Indoor Soccer League. “Hey, Trish, it says that fun, like babies, is to be expected. I'm signing us up." But Trish

What is the definition of love?

Kathi Lee Gifford scraped her fingernails across the chalkboard, causing Jen to cross her legs and clench her teeth. Nonplussed, Kathi Lee ran across the room, screaming for

My mother was a prostitute. I was born off the highway somewhere. My mother was just finishing up zipping up her John when she went into labor. This is how my story begins.

Some things will never go as planned and Andy had to admit that to himself. Justice would never be dealt, she was too clever and unpredictable for them. "There's only one thing

Bomb disposal is NOT a job for the faint hearted, which was unfortunate for Cpl. Jock Sergeant, who's heart was so faint as to be transparent. On his 1st day at bomb school, he sat

For a limited time only! The Turgid Stoat 2000 Personal Fortress now includes a flame thrower attachment, water restistance, an AK 47 attachment, night vision, rape whistle,

The leave blower walked into the gated community. He'd poured a jellied-gasoline into his blower. He lit his Pall-Mall and then held the lighter under the end of the "leaf blower"

I picked up Rosy on a run to Jacksonville. ME:"Where ya headed,hun?". R:"North,South Carolina." ME:"Where's that? R:"Norths about 90 miles southeast of Due West". ME:"Hold on a sec

Hardy knew that fucker spilled that scalding water on purpose. But Laurel's dead, soulless eyes, the eyes of a killer, meant he couldn't hurt him directly. Oh god, did he know?