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  • 75
    Avatar
    I've been staying up until one a.m, and that's only when I head upstairs, I usually don't fall asleep until much later. There's this anxious feeling. I dunno.
    Finished
    2018-01-03 13:34:39
    Took
    4 days, 11 hours, 30 minutes, 48 seconds
  • 75
    Avatar
    I have too many skeletons and not enough space to keep them.
    Finished
    2018-12-13 12:21:19
    Took
    28 days, 23 hours, 50 minutes, 12 seconds
  • 75
    Avatar
    She was a tiny dancer with awesome magical powers to
    Finished
    2014-11-11 20:05:41
    Took
    2 years, 274 days, 1 hour, 54 minutes, 13 seconds
  • 75
    Avatar
    Spam Baby wanted a Creamsicle, but nobody in this dimension had ever heard of one.
    Finished
    2015-06-17 19:09:44
    Took
    3 years, 34 days, 20 hours, 4 minutes
  • 75
    Avatar
    "F#@& me running!!" she said, after the rat trap snapped on the big joint of her left thumb. "'Rat traps won't maim' my ass!!"
    Finished
    2014-05-10 19:30:54
    Took
    1 year, 343 days, 15 hours, 33 minutes, 34 seconds
  • 75
    Avatar
    Jess' was riding shotgun with the Black Betty headed for Sugarland with a fresh chaingang. He took a swig from his hip flask. "Gimme' that" said Harly keeping one hand on the reins
    Finished
    2016-10-08 23:35:45
    Took
    4 years, 79 days, 10 hours, 51 minutes, 22 seconds
  • 75
    Avatar
    With consummate ease he put the lime in the coconut. Across the room, his rival had just succeeded in putting the bomp in the bomp-bah-bomp-bah-shomp. Meanwhile, in Rio, the
    Finished
    2013-11-06 18:16:19
    Took
    363 days, 22 hours, 6 minutes, 1 second
  • 76
    Avatar
    Amanda Widdershins looked around the sitting room with a bruised heart. The old farmhouse was presentable enough. The gloom in the northwest corner might even be a selling point.
    Finished
    2013-05-09 23:00:50
    Took
    1 year, 167 days, 1 hour, 15 minutes, 44 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    "Would you like Snakes on a Plane?" "I would not like them on a Plane." "Would you like Snakes on a Train?" "I would not like Snakes on a Plane. I would not like them in a Train.
    Finished
    2013-04-02 17:10:49
    Took
    1 year, 92 days, 18 hours, 46 minutes, 1 second
  • 76
    Avatar
    There once was a man from Nantucket
    Finished
    2012-12-05 10:19:40
    Took
    66 days, 4 hours, 29 minutes, 58 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    I sheathed myself in the garments fitting my caste and then I went to work just as I'd done every day since my extrusion. My task was unsavory, but I was congealed for this purpose
    Finished
    2016-09-18 05:38:17
    Took
    3 years, 315 days, 6 hours, 30 minutes, 34 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    Varla Du Gong lay seductively in a puddle of seawater upon the baby grand. Detective Manatee flicked the smoldering butt of his cigarette into the ashtray, adjusted his fedora,
    Finished
    2017-08-23 14:59:51
    Took
    4 years, 168 days, 13 hours, 17 minutes, 12 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    Paul McCartney adjusted his shirt and smoothed back his hair. This was it. It had finally happened. He'd always wanted to work in a drugstore and now he was a cashier at CVS
    Finished
    2015-04-04 15:23:12
    Took
    1 year, 350 days, 15 hours, 32 minutes, 57 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    I woke up with my hair dyed chartreuse, mint & ochre & carved into a facsimile o fthe leaning tower of Pisa topped by a gondola. I was the victim of extreme dog grooming... again..
    Finished
    2016-11-25 08:37:13
    Took
    2 years, 276 days, 22 hours, 15 minutes, 58 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    There is a 1% chance that I'll make it through the next 5 minutes without eating that entire chocolate bar in my desk. Did I say 1%? I meant none %. No! I will not eat it! I will
    Finished
    2019-05-03 02:02:26
    Took
    5 years, 152 days, 3 hours, 29 minutes, 39 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    I'm getting ready to go back into the hospital for another surgery. So, if for any reason I don't make it out alive, I just want to say that I've left you all something in my will.
    Finished
    2016-12-19 13:39:17
    Took
    2 years, 260 days, 10 hours, 35 minutes, 2 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    Your lips i taste one mine
    Finished
    2018-01-30 17:55:29
    Took
    3 years, 136 days, 12 hours, 47 minutes, 6 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    His spirit languished at a roadside bar, Karma the dregs in some unfinished bowl of chili there. The stools reminded him of the climb his life had been. Having been a door to door
    Finished
    2011-12-19 19:33:32
    Took
    297 days, 17 hours, 16 minutes, 34 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    Pretty kitty sitting so still. Are you hoping to catch your fill? The little brown mouse just ran in his house. Silly kitty sitting so still.
    Finished
    2012-05-17 14:47:08
    Took
    264 days, 15 hours, 38 minutes, 50 seconds
  • 76
    Avatar
    The crowded cheered and he basked in the glow of success. When they started chanting "speech speech" his handlers tried moving him off the balcony, but it was too late: "My fellow
    Finished
    2015-02-23 12:26:01
    Took
    3 years, 170 days, 14 hours, 52 minutes, 55 seconds
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