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Rachel had always loved figs, but wondered

  • Rachel had always loved figs, but wondered what all the fuss about figgy pudding was about. She decided that only way to satisfy her curiosity was a pilgrimmage to

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  • Finland, where she'd heard figgs had originated. She packed a huge backpack, shouldered it, and set out on foot. What she didn't know was that

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  • figgs didn't grow in Finland. And Finland was North, not Up, from her home. She never could read a map properly. She also didn't know that

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  • at that very moment, an enigmatic Finnish assassin crouched enigmatically on the roof of her house, directly above her, waiting to Finnish her off. Perhaps map reading wasn't all

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  • the the enigmatic assassin could do. He seemed like he could engimatically punch people in the face and then act like nothing had happened. He also seemed like he

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  • was trained by watching "Captians" where Shatner stepped all over anything interesting that the other captains had to say. The enigmatic assassin of talent

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  • big bad mamas boy Bill, lil' pimp, the rocket man sat on his high chair and said, "Scotty, beam me up - there's no intelligent life here." Patrick Stewart, Kate Mulgrew & the rest

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  • denied his request to "beam up" & left the rocket man to sulk with his own kind in mediocrity. Patrick Stewart asked Kate Mulgrew, "When Q tried to romance you, did he appear as a

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  • white, slightly chubby man with piercing eyes & a tight shirt by the name of Capt. Kirk?" Kate Mulgrew gasped at Patrick Stewart's question. "And did he behave passive aggressively

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  • towards Gene Roddenberry?" Gene Roddenberry appeared, quite offended, and declared, "I hope none of you live long and prosper." The universe imploded, because he is Roddenberry.

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1 Comments

  1. Jesrin Feb 28 2014 @ 10:37

    I am a bit disappointed with my ending. I ran out of time and I had to think of something. I was going to try to make some witty Star Trek pun that would blow everyone away, but nothing came to me. When in doubt, use Gene Roddenberry.

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