But Michelangelo was tired of the Ninja Turtle

  • But Michelangelo was tired of the Ninja Turtle schtick. Everywhere he went people said, "Let's kick some shell!" He hated that. He was a method actor. He'd cut his teeth on

  • a bandsaw, and since then, there was nothing he feared. No turtle or frog infested urban landscape was going to make him think twice about giving this new bananabread recipe to

  • Making a virtue of necessity, he merged his turtle pie, tong sui and the new bananabread recipe creating the "even newer and better bananabread recipe. He opened a chinese-american

  • stall on Brighton beach selling noodle burgers & sweet & sour cola. Then they imported Japanese Homo Sausage, & the Sino/Jappo/American fusion cuisine overtook all Southern England

  • but was quickly indistinguishable from the standard bangers & mash. Even multicultural international fusion held no chance against the momentum of centuries of sausage and potato.

  • Even when you tried to sneak a new spice or two into their bland "comfort food" recipes you got grief. "It's OK, but I like the regular way better" they would say. Well screw that

  • ! I didn't care if heartburn killed 'em. They needed sriracha & they needed it now. I put it in everything: on their toast for breakfast, in their prune juice, sprinkled on top of

  • their ice cream. Heck, I even put it in their bathwater. Still, it wasn't enough - they kept demanding more and more of the delicious red sauce. The lady at the store knew me by

  • the red bandana I wore on my head. Shop Lady knew us all by that infamous accessory. The Siracha Suppliers. We gave siracha sauce to those in need, but it was becoming an addiction

  • that was putting me into crippling debt. The sauce would my downfall, in the later years, where I ended up having a fatal overdose.



  1. lucielucie Aug 25 2014 @ 05:05

    Homo sausage is a Japanese sausage made from fish.

  2. 49erFaithful Aug 25 2014 @ 18:48

    Not where I come from it aint.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!