"I said a boom chick a rocka chicka rocka

"I said a boom chick a rocka chicka rocka chicka boom." Sang the Camp Counselor. She was wearing sweats. A clip board. On the Pine Stage doing her shtick. The son of the

sea god, Percy Jackson, called out, "SHUT UP!!!" I ducked behind a crowd to avoid the counselors, probing the audience for the caller.

The crowd performed a Mexican wave and then parted to reveal me on the big screen. The entire crowd roared with laughter at my t-shirt which said

"I'm with Turgid Stoat" and had a big arrow pointing south. It seemed the perfect time then for me to introduce the world to my newest dance, the Stoat, and I began to gambol and

gallivant around the dance floor. C'mon! Everybody do The Stoat! You just make your whole body really stiff & then sort of waddle back & forth while pushing your head front & back.

a shemale?" she asked. Dammit! I knew I shoulda watched the Harlem Shake before trying it! My dancing didn't disguise what was in my pants and having it mistaken for a turgid stoat

made me blush with pride. I shook my booty on the dance floor until my pet ermine, strapped to my left thigh woke up and sank its pointy teeth into my delicate flesh. Bellowing

"Get the ferret off me!" I fell to the floor writhing in pain. Luckily a bystander noticed the wriggling weasle's head protruding from my dress, and managed to unstrap and free the

critter from my lackluster bosomal protrusions. Oh, if only the varmint had been trapped between, further mayhem would not have ensued! My, I do believe I have the vapors!