Finished Folds (3241—3260)
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0had become common at the North Pole ever since global warming turned it into a Miami Beach-type scene. The elves had plenty of scratch and an insatiable thirst for erotic
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1was sitting at the back of the class and saved my ass by saying "Now we know!" On cue, I said "And knowing is half the battle!" All the kids raised an arm and cheered wildly.
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2mirror-image etch-a-sketch still lifes of tex mex meals. She figured she could market them to a cantina as window ads to finance her crippling decopage addiction. Her scissors
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4fits the Perfect 3: delicious, nutritious, and cheap! I usually have Cool Ranch for breakfast, Spicy Nacho for lunch, and a Salsa Verde / Four Cheese salad for dinner. If I get
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3of punching bags. He's constantly jabbing at my disco ball earrings or leaning over my desk 'accidentally' grazing my breasts. His coffee breath is atrocious. If it wasn't
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4felt like feet after Dr. Chong's lectures. Timmy wanted to be a Potanist too and was working on a thesis mixing Kush with Mauwie Wauwie. He was totally baked one afternoon when
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1lady patties. The customer curled his lip but didn't speak his mind. Instead he lit a cig and waited it out. When the manager finished his grope, the customer followed him into the
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3also her father's uncle and had tickets to Yonder Mountain String Band. She couldn't decide whether to take her cousin-brother or just miracle some poor shlub in the parking lot.
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0nother onset of priapism, oddly. He held one hand over his neck and used the other to support his problem area and took off running towards the nearest hospital. He knew from exper
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3What do I get? Cake, hives, and debilitating back pain. I must have some bad karma. There was that one time I stole a bike. How was I supposed to know
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1felt so strongly about this that he put on his best mummy costume and began murdering random strangers once per week. After a couple months
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1Dykeson's Militia Training Academy. John had the midget crew stuffing black powder into knee-high panty hose when the Feds showed up. You've never seen such chaos. Two midgets
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7wouldn't schedule a normal money drop like all the other blackmailers. No matter. OJ checked behind him and the Jackson 5 were right there. He chucked the suitcase out the window
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10began to debone the fish. The other train passengers immediately moved to other cars. Tork had been on the run for weeks and even for a madman, he looked like a lunatic. A metallic
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5eating canned mini-wieners and watching the Discovery Channel all day. Unfortunately for the bio-nerds, extreme nitrate intake caused severe dementia and at the 3rd annual
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4knockoff leatherman and looked for the chicken toenail remover tool. Mose held the chicken while Dwight approached with what amounted to a cheap pair of scissors. When he
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5doing people's taxes down at H&R Block. They didn't drug test and I could add pretty decently actually. One guy got really mad when I
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1After all, who isn't? She figured she'd speed things up by unbuttoning the top 2 buttons on her blouse and bringing some popcorn up to the accountant. When she got to his desk she
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3eating a bowl of Frosted Mini-Wheats at the same time. My mother-in-law screamed at me to get out of the bathroom and I didn't know whether to laugh or throw up. I threw
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4mad ass-clenching jump-roping skills during Oprah's annual Double Dutch Community Outreach show. I could get a good 12" of air with cheek power alone and could lay down sick rhymes