Finished Folds (681—700)
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2warrant was approved, and a reward of forty-five dollars for my capture was announced over the McDonald's loudspeaker. I stuffed my super-sized Big Mac combo down my pants and
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2which peeved the tiger beyond belief; it roared, twisted, and jumped until its penis popped out of Harly's mouth. The game warden snatched him up and placed him next to the other
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4"Excuse me!" he shouted angrily. "If you two don't shut up, you'll have to leave!" My wife and I stopped laughing and shot the usher a WTF look. "Hamlet is not a comedy, idiots!
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8General tso chicken. 20) Vaginoplasty. 21) Speculation. 22) Hummus. 23) and I am getting very near the end now...anterior cruciate ligament...oh, hold on...just a few more. 24)
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1and matching bow tie were all he wore. The quaaludes were kicking in and the snowy white 18-year-old model slumped motionless on the floor. Bill grinned, drooling like a baby,
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3I'm not talking about the kind of mudslinging politician's do, like when one says you shouldn't vote for the other guy 'cause his wife used to be the bearded lady in the circus.
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3Just to spite THEM, if I knew I was going to die that day, I would have gone to school and had sex with Mary Lou Finklestein, in the cafeteria, while eating a
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1"Is I?" Zinnia acted surprised. "Well I declare...bankruptcy, that is!" One of the two men in tailored suits by the Gap couldn't take his eyes of Zinnia's elephantine breasts, and
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2"That's easy to say, but hard to do," Cesar replied. "Which one? The Nimbus 2000, the Mojowijo, the Lady Gag Gag, the Avatar Fleshlight?" "Okay, okay," I stopped him. "I didn't
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4but, then I looked at her, studying her curly black hair and bushy mustache. "That's right!" The elderly Mistress Banana Hammock cried, before I could. "Borat is my boyfriend."
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6Hell's furnace and feed it the folder monkeys; every Spoonerism. Now...starting over: If we band together, Shirley can be Squiggy and Laverne can be...ah...forget the whole stupid
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2reason for Catfishing to begin with. As Jokey, he never had a single date...but as Gumby...well...the women were whores, putting out on the spot. Did Pokey know that Jokey was a
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5an intervention from the Castelluccio brothers. No knee caps needed to be broken. But; I wanted to scream. I moved toward her and licked the kraut from her chin. Then I slapped
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1rightfully so...she was completely naked, except for her skates. She skated back and forth across the ice six times. Then she took her skates off and put them back on six times.
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5When completely metamorphosed, I changed my name to Gregor Samsa and got a job providing shade to people outside of the Franz Kafka museum in Germany. Finally a good paying job!
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3whispered, plucking the wild hairs from around her areolas. "Your son spends every minute of every day watching chimpanzees eating their own feces;that isn't a healthy thing for
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3Don Wand 12-inch jelly Pleasure dong, with Swirl Mushroom Tip Rocket, Blue dildo-shaped galaxy some 200 million light years from Earth. Steven McManaman would live ad infinitum
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1pungently ripe toe jam cheese on stale and moldy banana bread with slimy poop-colored spoiled basil and a bottle of Ripple. It was enough to make me heave all over my brand new
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2hemorrhaged...exploded...flesh-eating bacteria consumed my Egyptian brain...I developed Traumatic Basal ganglia hemorrhage...before long I was not Egyptian...I was an apple picker
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3the "old" Ashram--which was really a dyslexic spelling of Marsha backwards. Once there, the girl opened up a house of ill repute, and called it Beth Midrash. Simple Peter was the