Finished Folds (281—300)
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4It's important to marinate the meat tenderizer in olive juice before hammering out the mushy munchkins into thin, flat strips. The juice imparts a delicate flavor to the hammer,
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5Then a tiny spark set off a huge methane explosion and he died. The end. (Note: No clownfish were harmed in the making of this FoldingStory.)
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7A month later, when I stood trial for blowing my sister's head off with a shotgun, I was acquitted when a member of the jury had also turned out to be a zombie in training. Go me!
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4"CUT!" The director was furious. "I thought I told you to upgrade the processor in that sound-effects machine!" The SFX tech shrugged and rebooted the machine. "Okay, take two!"
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5and thrown onto a stretcher before I could recite the next page of the Necronomicon. Off I was whisked to the hospital, where they placed me in a padded room. The voices were still
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5will be granted... after this word from our sponsors!" The genie displayed a large flashing sign telling Billy to install a virus scanner on his crystal ball. "Make me a Roc NOW!"
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6Do you need your squob twiggled? Call Disco Clown Services, where every employee is an expert in twiggling squobs, and we guarantee the best experience and professional results.
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2but poorly-timed bald joke. "AAAAUGGGGHHH!!!" went Colin, as he pantomimed his way down off the pile of imaginary vehicles to fall flat on his face, his chrome dome shining bright
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10As we approached the summit, the aurora shone brilliantly above us, reminding us all of just how tiny and pathetic we are in the vastness of space and time. We were truly humbled.
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4and then a _________ happened, and there were ________ in my ________ which I couldn't ________ because we were _________ with a __________ and some
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3Like, seriously, Dad! It's your fault! Why'd you have to procreate in the first place?
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4The seal screamed in horror as the man reached toward her, but when she felt his gentle touch, she opened her eyes again. He wore a kindly, reassuring smile, and she slowly warmed
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6aliens begin their exotic cabaret dance, he couldn't resist getting up on the stage with them. Next thing he knew, he was in an unfamiliar bed in a galaxy far, far away, with a
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2The end.
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0I am so mind-numbingly bored. Someone entertain me.
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10serving some green bananas to Chaz, thinking that this would be seen as a kind gesture of diplomacy. Instead, Chaz brought upon Kiefer such a penalty that only a seasoned veteran
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5" The psychiatrist reached over to poke his patient's shoulder. "Marty, you're drifting off again." Marty snapped back to reality. "Oh, yeah, sorry. Anyway, satin, jewelry, women,
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5way of my dreams. Since childhood, I'd vowed that I would one day open that door and discover the secrets that lay beyond. Every attempt was an exercise in futility. The door would
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2took the opportunity to whack him over the head with a frying pan. Out like a light. Good, now I could set my plan in motion. What matters to me, indeed. Stupid intrusive surveys.
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3your sad devotion to that ancient Jedi religion? I'll remind you that you still haven't conjured up the stolen data tapes, and you still don't have clairvoyance enough to find the