Finished Folds (61—80)
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4"Vanilla. An idea so normal that ...it's weird! I love it!" Wagner jumped out of the shower, "on the way let's talk about ...the weather!" He grabbed my hand and led me outside
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6have done! Sure she's a cow, but her feelings aren't made of leather!" It was plain to see that this raging beast took no bull. He was seeing red and ready for a fight to the death
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2But blood is thicker than the evolutionary sludge from whence all life began. Despite the ill-repute of the profession, I decided then and there to go into the family business.
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2k. Then I remembered flaming snake skull tattoo on my midriff. "Heh, I got that a long time ago," I squirmed, "I'm, ah, a different person now." She looked incredulous, "It looks
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5forever. If you're reading this manifesto, you have most likely killed me for my gold. Congratulations. If that's not true, my condolences -- I'm standing behind you with a gun.
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2"Uuuuuhhh me no mean to say me gay, me uhhhh... asexual?" The Chief eyed me suspiciously. "Good good Gringo, this mean you virgin, make good sacrifice to lava god." Son of a
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0I
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4use as a puck, being not remotely puck-like. Turns out you can buy a hockey puck for like three bucks at Big-5. But by the time I realized, my boy had grown into an adult nerd.
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6the Outback is a beautiful, culturally enriching experience. On your journey you may discover ancient aboriginal petroglyphs, or perhaps have a chance encounter with a koala! Every
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4But sure enough, a receipt showing full payment popped out of his sock. "I gots magic feet." Sloppy Joe explained. Ma Bell wished she could be impressed, but tech support had just
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5of your rude, stupid, jerk face!" Clearly the meat was rotten both inside and out, literally and figuratively. "So that's a yes?" the talent scout asked. "...yes." replied the meat
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2"Don't forget the 'DeGrasse'. Never forget the 'DeGrasse'." "Sorry Neil. Where were we?" "Well I'm awake now... how about I explore that little planet between Saturn and Neptune?"
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4was harder than The Rock's bottom. But from those ashes I have emerged stronger and wiser, with new ideas that will change the world! Coming soon: "Munching on Subway six-inchers"!
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5"That makes sound, logical sense," Saki replied, "you were always the smart one in our marriage." They smiled. With his ghostly mission complete, Saki finally found peace. The end.
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4Carbohydrates, tobacco, and a city that reveled in every vice known to man. This was the life. Down on the casino floor the Smokers were in a scuffle with the Franchers. Sin City's
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6c'mon!" Again the attorney and client conferred. "Your Honor, yeeeea boi let the record show she hella thicc." "Objection!" cried the defense "Juror #9 is obviously a ratchet ho!"
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14ey lived happily ever after. Well, mostly. Two outta three ain't bad. The end. P.S. Regina's second head went on to become a supreme court justice, so it wasn't all bad for her.
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10in perfect unison. Then a sausage guru stepped forward and said "Oh holy fa! We have all wondered for years, what does fa actually mean?" The fa simply replied "It's an acronym for
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8to give me a kiss!" Jeez louise. Flopper was a washed-up celebrity dolphin whose blowhole smelled like menthol cigarettes. But he knew Poseidon. "Me, or my mermaid wife?" I asked
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2woman whose eyes held the essence of time. My hope for a different future died with them as they were gunned down in a raid the next night. But I'll never forget those eyes.