Finished Folds (101—120)
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4right above a pointy spire on Count Dracula's castle. Just before I would be impaled, a bat swooped in and grabbed me. "Welcome back" he smirked. I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, dad."
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2not wish to do this. Furious, the two gentlemen on a pee strike, refusing to urinate until the bathroom attendants gave in. "This sucks" said the Colonel. "Yeah," Mr. Grey replied,
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6they will finally respect us!" Bruce the Bull was pleased with this idea. So all the cattle went about creating the world's biggest cow pie, singing "Moompa loompa, doopity moo,
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3Her eyeliner had been poisoned by her understudy Camilla. Camilla's eyes flashed as her only obstacle to fame was lifelessly dragged from the stage. "The show must go on," she said
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3"Don't mess with the dark arts if you've got boy and girl parts."
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5I must have pulled a million donuts on the onramp that evening, a single tear rolling down my cheek as the sun dipped below the horizon. I think it was the caustic tire smoke.
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3the Planet Tamer at Earth itself. The entire human race stopped suddenly and simultaneously realized the error of their ways. From that moment on, humanity lived in perfect peace.
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4"Fine," said Satan, "I concede." What a sucker. The licensing agreement ended up doing so well for me I ended up a majority shareholder in hell itself. I guess that makes me
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10tightly. What a lousy birthday this turned out to be.
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2"Hello my friends!" he said cordially, "can we invite you to dinner at our village?" We couldn't refuse! The vegtables were perfectly roasted and the bbq pork smelled exactly like
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2But when anyone tried not to rhyme, they immediately got hit by a lime. It became humanity's curse to say every sentence in verse. Even my young brother Tucker, and he was one dumb
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9but they couldn't pull the wool over my eyes: I was being fleeced. The shear audacity! I always kept a shank from my life on the lamb, and mutton could stop me now. Mutton at all.
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6Of course, that's not what the fry cook meant by "onion ring". Still, he took pity on her poor Walla Walla soul and spared her from the oil. Sitting on the shelf by the stove, she
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2CAPTCHA. Putting on sunglasses, he smirked "Read this, bozos." "e7eRt4Z" a nearby clown responded without hesitation.
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2"Gungan begonegan!" the priest chanted as he burned the Limited Edition Episode 1 action figure. Somewhere in a galaxy far, far away a voice cried "Meesa think voodoo is doodoo!"
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4It was a compelling argument. "Alright, some probing," they relented, "but just because I respect your authority as a nurse." "Thank you," said the nurse while beginning to probe
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5vermilion leaves. Red his house with a red little window and a red Corvette and everything is red for him and himself and everybody around. Norman's poor vampire brain couldn't
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4caught feelings for me." How... how did he know? It's something I had barely admitted to myself. Looking into his eyes I suddenly didn't care if I got thrown into space jail. Angus
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3buzzily. "Yes, I did," said God, who had been there the whole time, "and I have one more trick to teach you." It turned out to be a lame card trick; Houdini was super disappointed.
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7Life's funny like that. In a way, this whole story was a metaphor for life itself: birth, the trials and tribulations of living, and inescapable inevitability of the grave.