Finished Folds (41—60)
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2"Hefeweizen." Flash forward ten years - I'm deep undercover in Portland. Flannel? Check. Shorts? CHeck? Massive beard? Check. The Culinary Institute of America (CIA) dossier said
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3danum-soaked applause, and soon an expedition to the fabled continent of Euthanasia was swiftly being planned. As Chief Expeditionary, I was given a stipend of forty two million
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3kept Shamu. Nothing would stop my quest for vengeance. With a burst of speed I caught up with the frogman and grabbed onto his flippered foot. Too late I noticed the deadly
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2Better yet, maybe I could train the Sunday school kids into a squad of assassins-for-hire - no one would ever suspect preschoolers to be murderers. Madge's husband wouldn't know
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1berry?" The stench of hideously artificial strawberry scent wafted into his nose as the she-wolf in heels continued to chew on his patella. Just when he thought he could stand it
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10Delerium", "Tremens" and "Trafalgar" simply because she could. Her husband, "Mister Cuddles", had been similarly nominally abused as a child, and together they embraced the absurd
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5The top of my Spiderman Underoos was erotically exposed for her to feast on with her eyes. I licked my lips then took a sip from my beer helmet - I had a Corona on the left and an
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4Vern the Amish guy had a duck growing out of his side and liked to lawn bowl nude with his uncle. I first met Vern back in
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5a man in Elbow, KY self-immolated while trying to light his cigarette with a flamethrower. "Extreme Home Stupidity" soon spawned a sequel, the ineptly named "Sparly Vampires Must
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5I opened the door to find it there again. If sofa's could smirk, I'm sure this one would've. I set down my purse and the groceries and addressed the empty air: "Aunt Valetta!"
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5which quickly countered their hens with micro-animal foods of their own: blue whale poppers and grizzly bits soon became all the rage. The GM vegetables coldy looked on, plotting.
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8The dapper old man with white wispy hair and ruddy cheeks whistled cheerfully as he walked through the park, handing out handbills for
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4She awoke, disoriented and blinded by the light above her. She looked on in mute, paralyzed horror as small furry gremlin-like creatures began to perform surgery on her arm stump,
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3caribou antlers and a jug of mucilage to her best friend's sister's
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2but because it was written in crayon in block letters, Mythbusters misread it and thought that they were testing whether Silly String fired faster than Spiderman's penis. After
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1A quite smelly fish.
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5would eviscerate passersby. The Alien would also steal Reese's Pieces from 7-11s by hiding in the Slurpee machine until closing time. It loved to shoot pieces into E.T.'s
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1fathom. Her mind snapped and she began to drool upon herself, the stain spreading until it resembled a map of Norway. Ever since Cthulhu Inc. had purchased Microsoft, Powerpoint
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5For every dog, a cat that could care less - and often does. For that cat, there is a hairball, inversely proportionate in size to the length in centimeters of the cat's fur, just
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4Day 2,346,439 since the destruction of the colonies. From the personal log of Swill Adamant, 5-Star Rear Double Admiral of the Colonial Fleet and the Cattle Car Impractical: