Finished Folds (641—655)
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5The elevator hit on me this morning. No kidding - right as I got in and started to press the button for the 32nd floor, it whispered in its soothing, Muzak voice, "I want to bear
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6"Jenney's First Year Latin" was, contrary to popular belief, not written by Jenney, Scudder and Baade as advertised on its spine. No, quite to the contrary. As many young Latin
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4spit roast it, devour its flesh and thereby gain its powers for herself? She hastily consulted her horoscope while the sheep consumed her skirt with a vapid yet malign air.
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3chanted "Kumbaya, My Lord" under her breath incessantly for an hour that she could function normally - well, as normally as someone who sings under their breath can be. "Hard to
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5"Worlds Largest Cheddar Wedge" failed to draw the crowds of tourists that Hammond so desperately needed to survive and make it into round 2 of Battle of the Midwestern Towns, the
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4The room spun - not really, it was in his head, but the net effect was the same: he lost his lunch on the old woman sitting next to him at the conference. The look of horror on her
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3nobody's business - a little poo was not a deterrent. Reluctantly the band of adventurers flushed themselves one by one down the Toilet of Doom, arriving with a splash in
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8nearest library to refresh my memory of the core Harry Potter spells. For some reason, "Expeliarmus" will not stay in my head. What a crappy wizard I'd be, I think as I head out
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4I've became obsessed with gaining super speed, so much so that every time it storms, I run to my chemical set, hoping a stray bolt of lightning will strike, just like in the Flash
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4"For sale, baby shoes, never worn" read the slip of paper. Dammit, why were the higher ups obsessed with Hemingway references? Last time, his contact had been an old man on a
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7rather blase about doing anything - after all, you could just leave materials around and, soon enough, they would spontaneously assemble into useful things like food and iPads. Yet
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1The man in the bright green 80s strapless tube dress and torn fishnets winked a heavily made-up eye at me, then, twirling around the lamppost, stuck his ample behind sheathed in
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5rrels were in on the deal, stealing back honey from shops and supermarkets all over the city. There were rumors that factories that manufactured beekeepers' clothing had been fire
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1army of underaged hookers he keeps in his basement." The tears poured out as she sobbed, "I've seen them. They are SO skinny - I'd be gone faster than a bucket of KFC in a
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5The zombie apocalypse came, as many dreaded it would - but not to humanity. Proving that either there was no God - or that he existed and had a twisted sense of humor - squirrels