Finished Folds (541—560)
-
4magic wand & ZAP! I found myself in the French Quarter selling Lucky Dogs! Best job I ever had & no one seemed to notice my scar.I spotted her hanging over a balcony on Bourbon St
-
4ses. Problem was that the bacteria didn't know when to stop. It's unfortunate women don't seem to realize that skeleton bodies are so unattractive. Nothin' to hold on to.
-
2Miraculously, imprints of Jesus dressed in his tux preparing for the wedding slowly emerged on the back of the shirts. People nearby gasped & grasped for the shirts the pastor held
-
4Sure, she stunk & stunk bad. It didn't help that I had an acute case of hyperosmia.I pulled her on top of me & nuzzled her noxious neck."We can work this out," I told her, coughing
-
5The bride crumpled down to the floor, fanlike, in 10 creases, embarrassed but knowing she had no regrets. "And I folded my groom too!" she cried.The priest made a sign of the cross
-
16Shambalabala, grinned toothily."You tell 'em, Buddy," he said softly with just the right amount of softness. SuperBuddy spun his prayer wheel while the robbers watched, mesmorized
-
5saved my life because it was made of iron. Sure the rest of my body burnt to a crisp in the fiery crash, but my telltale heart was still beating, so technically I was still alive.
-
4...while I looked emuciated.But you know what they say: Opposites attract.She lunged on me suddenly,but you know, I was used to this reaction from women.It was my animal magnetism.
-
5right into the stern countenance of Jillian Michaels. "I'm gonna kick your ass, King Candy!" she shouted as she landed a sharp blow to my chocolate covered nuts. She blamed me for
-
7I wiped a green blob of pus from my keyboard & kept typing. I couldn't care less about the writer's strike or the threats impaled on my front door. I was an FS scab writer & proud
-
4I looked back down at what was left on my plate. Apparently it wasn't filet mignon.The woodland spirits' laughter sounded like tinking bells. A horn sprung from my forehead. Rainbo
-
5r thing, I just can't stand it when you.... Hey wait, is that candy corn you got there? Gimme some & I'll forgive you. Yes, the whole bag." Mr. Wikipedia hung his head and obeyed.
-
8ut the ax imbedded in the back of my head. It distracted me from focusing on the lovely Lady Midday. Her pink rosebud lips were moving, but in my impaired state, I could not form
-
5overalls. I could just say it was pig slop. Shoving my red-eyed demon baby behind a bale of hay, I crept out of the barn & took a deep breath. A piercing scream had me running back
-
5. Why did odd things like this always happen to me? My wife's pickled eyes amused me for some reason. Buster was less than amused, however, & gestured for me to pull his face out
-
4The saloon doors swung open. The sun outlined the largest, stiffest man Jill had ever seen. He swaggered in, threw Jill over his meaty shoulder, & they rode off into the sunset.
-
5of gin into his teacup & waited for the expected reaction.There was nothing Buster Gonad enjoyed more than generating drama. A knock at the door of his trailer. "Enter!" he rasped.
-
7whether sailing a ship made of popsicle sticks was such a good idea. I had doubts about my self-doubt. Of that I was sure. I knew about the unknown, so I turned my back to face it.
-
5it was a 2-for-1 deal. "So," I said softly to Shy Lucie, "You like Spiderwoman too?" But before Shy Lucie could answer, Loud Lucie interrupted. "Shuddup. I have a headache." Shy Lu
-
5uncomfortably on the caribou's back, thinking of my wife back home.To pass the time, T Boone & I starting singing. Then I passed some natural gas of my own. Boone Pickens wondered