Finished Folds (261—280)
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5when my new bride declared she was going to throw a flower-festooned concrete block instead of a bouquet as a symbol of the strength of our union, I had to step in."Darling" I said
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3was the only thing Beelzebub, Jr. was afraid of. This was a huge annoyance to his father, so one night the Devil decided to cure Beelzebub, Jr. of his fear of the dark once and for
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4underwear this week because his shipment was on backorder. Fred never washed anything. He'd throw it away & buy a new one. Kate, however, was a hoarder and retrieved Fred's briefs
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4Meanwhile, Chince Parming planned to be up all night let gucky. Beeping Slooty and Rindecella were dyed- in-the-wool garty pirls and when they saw him spiking the bunch powl
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7Bob figured the beers were kicking in--the walrus at his door sounded like his landlord. "Let's wait a bit" Bob said "before we have our chat, cuz some of us are stinking drunk and
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7Is she single? know waht Id do.lol. WTPA. FTF. FWB, IKR?" Commentors didn't like Banana28's response to the post & criticized his spelling, his mama, his very existence on earth
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5definitely smoking pot when he created Star Wars. All potheads know that an anagram with George Lucas, R2D2 and C3PO's names creates a secret code name for cannabis sativa. That's
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9when I smiled. Soon, we had our evening Immodium "cordials" together and she'd affectionately rubber mallet my dentures to help cement them to my gums. Love in an old folks home wa
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4"Oh Honey, I" and then he died. I was traumatized. From then on, I hated endings. I'd turn off the TV before the show was over, tie only one shoe, trail off in the middle of a sen
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6hand he karate-chopped her R arm and she let go of his R earlobe but stuck her R finger in his L nostril and twisted his head L. Quickly rolling L, he broke free and lifted his R
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4The baby bodyguard wobbled unsteadily due to the pistol stuck in the left side of his diaper. He menacingly chewed on a pair of handcuffs.He was the right person for the job becaus
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7d, sucking his thumb and curling his index finger around the bridge of his nose."You don't learn everything you need to know in Kindergarten anymore" I told him."To succeed in life
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4This was how the legend began.Sandra made the liar remove his pants. She hung them from the telephone wire. She lit them on fire. Her statuesque figure retreated into the sunset
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6But is it a nightmare or a tangent universe? If a dreamscape scary rabbit tells you to wake up, shows you the future, and asks if you've ever seen a portal, the question's answered
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6& propelled it by the seashore with our coffee-infused Montezuma's revenge.Our detritus enticed copious tilapia, shrimp & crab & we were hailed as local heroes. Best vacation ever!
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5"Aargh!" exclaimed one aardvark, "let's just staart digging!" "Waait!" said another, "if we don't haave a plaan, whaat'll we do when we get out? I saay, aambush the zookeeper aand
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5LISTEN, THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH FORGETTING TO FILL MY VALIUM PRESCRIPTION, MY CAPS LOCK KEY REALLY IS STUCK. IF I WAS YELLING, I'D FIND SOMETHING RELEVANT TO YELL ABOUT LIKE
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4I tried to resist the folding insanity but there they all were, beckoning me from my computer screen, like a Hostess cupcake, like a chateaubriand, like a winning lottery ticket
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3ing in mesmerizing infinity loops around a dumpster. As I stood transfixed, a dumpster diver emerged from the mass of swishing, pirouetting plastic bags
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5mayonnaise in the lumbar region, a daily scalp mustard plaster and wearing a piece of sliced ham under a Bavarian lederhosen or dirndl will bring back your sandwich making skills