Hi. My name is Bobby James Sinister. BJ, for short. I ain't the smartest guy there is--I ain't even tenth grade smart--but I'm smart enough to own my own lawn service...Mary Jane

was quite annoying. She complained all day and wouldn't do anything until he gave her a raise. It didn't help that he was covered in cake and children's boogers after coming back

oozy in here, and I want out! Suddenly, a light appears at the end of the gooey tunnel and two metal objects reach in and grab my cranium! They pull me through into the brightest

Pope Marco karate chopped Bishop Ped Xing who responded with a judo move that sent Pope Marco flying over the stack of counterfeit indulgences they were fighting over. "Christ say,

DeepText 7320 recoiled somewhat from the congratulations then it was surprised/delighted/appalled/confused and nearly had a whiteout. "Be calm, be calm," it told itself. Folding w

aficionado of Sudoku Extreme, who turned out to be the hapless boyfriend of three Japanese ai-girls imagined by one of China's nascent megaminds. The Number Island hack triggered

I've never been more certain...it is incontrovertible...as clear as virgin glass...indubitable dubiety...categorically unequivocal...transparently pronounced...and those feelings

Desde infante a sido un problema paras los spantos suspichitos que se eyan en mi edificio primera.

Perhaps the orange buffoon was really a bear. The buffoonery had us throwing up our hands in despair while the real chess master proved to be a great puppeteer with his hand up the

We drove into the black hole with the Rolling Stones our companions. The Girl With Faraway Eyes hit close to home but that was why I liked to hear it. To be reminded of what I've

His Excellency ate his pimiento with El Vato and his pato over on El Dorado Avenue by the new cathouse supply place. So what if the lion is sleeping as long as it isn’t eating you.

. "Moneesha! Mon-EESHA! Get yo ugly ass outta bed NOW!" Oh. It was Tyler. Nobody to me. I rolled over & put the pillow over my head to drown out the pounding. Then...CRA-AAASH!

I truly was about to have an accident. I raced into the McDonalds and headed toward the rear, towards the men's room, but an Out of Order sign hung from the door...before I could

vanished. It wasn't dramatic, he was just there and then he wasn't. Where was Dream City he'd spoken of? How could I get there? My lifelong search started that day unbeknownst to me

under his breath that seemed to be the most disturbing. Bob finished his meal quickly and stood to leave. He glanced quickly over at the cat draped fellow as he grabbed his things.

I blow a whistle and order all the clowns to close the tent opening before the twister reaches the big top and puts a big drop on the drawers of the circus...if you catch my drift

I hated waking up to the sound of a bee trying to escape the inside of a styrofoam cup. Then I'd see the old man open the top of the electric razor and sprinkle the white powder on

If I had to spend my existence as a bug, I would want that existence to be monumental...profound...I would want to cohabitate with as many female bugs there were in a lifetime

Unless, of course...it is not. Which I'm not saying it is. I'm just saying it could be...might be...but, whatever it is and whichever way it goes, even after all that, it still is

Yeah...I hate that. Whatever that was...that thing I forgot. I hate when I forget what it was because I'm sure it was something very important to me...oh, well...I'm sure it'll