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My arms had been replaced with giant pulsating tenticals that writhed violently. My tongue felt row after row of razor sharp, cracked teeth. I burped, and green ooze
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to nope on out of that conversation. But it turned out everyone at the soirée was having a similar conversation. Tad Worthington was attempting to define what a butt plugypus was w
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good day and I would also like to remind you that giants can be gentle when they want to be. Sizism is a major problem in this country. Tell them to put that in my elegy at my fune
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make Rapunzel jealous. This man has to be fresh and new. And he must condition. What good is long hair when it's all knotted up? I need someone better
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Curses the guy to high heaven, but she knows she won't stop going there. After all he did save her life once. And she enjoys his company. She reminds him of her big brother, who
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Baby girl you have to suck, latch on and drink all the milk you can. Doctor says you're malnourished. And I won't let you die, my second beautiful daughter, I won't let you meet th
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tell them their future. Some say yes. I always tell them they will get run over by a car. Then I run them over with my car. I am the most successful fortune teller in the tristate
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their droppings. In fact, in certain countries they are a delicacy often served with maggot-filled couscous. You also don't have to spend exorbitant amounts of money on grooming
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MoldingStory. The idea sounds like nonsense. Who would want to replace such a perfect website with a website where you could build anything you want... Now that you think about it.
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when my heart's not in it. Things just haven't been the same since my wife left me for an independently wealthy ombudsman with a fabulous mustache. Critter hunting is about all I
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ay he glowered at anyone who met his eyes and growled when someone dared to be occupying a spot he wanted to sweep with the metal detector. The 2 handed sword grip was suspicious
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baby who revealed to her all the secrets of the world and extolled the virtues of infinity. She began to observe the world through her mind's eye not passing judgement- just being.
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ded jeans upon which we wrote the facts of the case." Det Manatee pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he continued to the young officer. "Mr. and Mrs. Deville are newly
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I make my living concocting potions and selling them to Hollywood wannabe movie stars like Tinsley Indigo-Taylor, Peyton-Ursula "Sage" Stewart-Young and Alayna Scott Swann.
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-urt building just because your forefathers built yurts. Just change universes and you can find another career. If you hover over a universe you will be able to see what it has in
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-s apologizing in song for not having the correct change. The Sunglass Hut executives were not at all amused by God's overtures and threatened to sue Him. In court, God asked the
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for freshly fried sinner, of which there seemed to be an unending supply. "Goo' boy, Al," little Lucifer said as he patted his unholy head, "Now spit them out so we can refry them.
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I love/Hate when in anticipation of getting out of bed I do a full body stretch and I overcome by sense of calm that I don't now want to move & lose it but I still need to get up.
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Pumas (jungle cat stand up comedians from Austria) decided to put on a one night only comedy festival to raise money for the poor doomed humans. The venue was booked, the date set,
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Lolita's next stop was the Folger's factory where she traded in the glass container and it's contents for a sizable tin of cheap disgusting Folger's Coffee. Just the worst coffee.