Becca was at a loss. Ever since she had been held for ransom she had been told NOT to get any funny ideas. Now her captor seemed to have changed his mind. She racked her brains for

he had imagined were after his food. "Silly Whiskers!" he said, "Purple Monkeys hate tofu, now calm down." And Whiskers would believe him and fall asleep on his feet, pinning him

stepped out into time square wearing nothing but a hot dog bun & sombrero. The baker was humiliated by the Grand Inquisitor & vowed revenge. He grabbed my hand one dark night & we

Their eyes we unblinking, and shrouded in milky white, so that their original colour was barely visible. We stared over the edge of the ship, stuck in that damned coral reef,

species rested on our drunken, sweaty shoulders as we did the blorphan tango - you know, the klrr'vip of two backs, or whatever. When I asked about our future, she shushed me, and

cream and could only sit at its dressing table complaining about its rough, raw dishwashing hands. At first I thought this was an improvement, but after a while it wore on me and I

An attack on the brainwashed masses, but rather a chance to save your soul. Every line folded counts. Every story is unique. Everything for the smorgasbord, including lutfisk.

weeds and discover new & Amazon remakes of bad products. To boldly go where no smart person would sanely go. In other words to make us all look way smarter than we really are until

"Wow wow, bow-wow, how about we play SAO now?"

Jesus Christ my lord and savior present while I give Ashton Kutcher the lapdance of his dreams. My mother doesn't know, but if she did she would

recipe and I cannot complete the appetiser without it. Manners mean nothing when you cannot serve your friends food. Eggs and invisible mustard, sounds more like disappointment and

as she crossed out 'MADE IN' and in its place wrote 'RETURN TO'. She then tossed the crystal ball aside and climbed into the box, sealing herself in. When the box was collected

sandwich in one hand and the head of an enemy in another. The ground beneath was shaking to a rhythm, and the song was recognised in an instant, no less than the sweet tune by

They casually took strategic stances around her, making a pentagram with her at the center all while trying to keep her attention from noticing that is what they are doing. She saw

his compound eyes all in alignment and focused on me. "You heard, your underpants are done," Lord Morgus said then turned to clackT and told him to target the dryer and me. I dived

He played on a mini treadmill, blissfully going round and round while chanting OM NAMAH SHIVAYA and doing a Lord Shiva dance. Meanwhile, Hamlet ate cat food and meowed all day.

Melina didn't know much about the man who was taking her to a trip in the woods. All she knew is that she was in love with this Simon guy. She was so lost for him that she couldn't

sharpened their poop-chute pokers in anticipation of Drumpf's arrival in Heck, but his bus arrived there without him. In his place was a duck with a wad of gum stuck to his head.

also noted that these prehistoric photographs were printed on slabs of stone. In spite of their rudimentary focus, the depictions of pterosaurs as garbage disposals were clear enou

forms at the bank and deposited the money to my new account. When I then tried to buy airline tickets out of town I was told that the money had not yet cleared. I was in a bind!