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jar of Nutella and watched endless episodes of FRIENDS. Friends, and employment, were just what my reclusive millennial children needed. So I dragged them by the collars and took
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irresistibly al dente. The flatulence, a serendipitous byproduct of my gluttony, saved me from the doom that met virtually all other human life. My only company was an IBS-afflicte
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I went to see a psychiatrist because I wanted to see a psychiatrist in his natural habitat. I created a psychiatrist & told him to act separate from me as creator or as patient. He
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All those aliens you see in movies are not real. Those are just people who take body modifications to the max. I can't imagine how much it costs to have your gastro intestinals on
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She told them also to hard code a green nose to the human genome. Make that now the default option. Let us also discourage the flesh colored nose as well. It can still be a choice.
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When she tromboned the twins in intramural sex romp 102, all bets were off the table. When she tabla rasa-ed the Philosophy Departments of Pluto, Mars, Peter, and Mary. They wore a
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It is like trying to hang your hat on a moving target. But you realise the moving target isn't the target, you are. Then you rethink staying on the moving target. Why should the
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By the time the world knew that jimbeau was the Greatest Ass-Kicker to ever walk on God's green Earth, he had already kicked the world's asses into one world government with him as
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I wonder how many men of old ended up in institutions simply because they were heard arguing with themselves. Several of me think I understand. The others don't know a shit from a
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Better to forget them. They are just memories. This hot tamale is real and saucy. I don't like my hot tamales saucy. Wait. Oh yeah I do. Damelos salsas de lumbre. Que se chinge el
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The trick was reminding yourself that you'd already done even when you know you were lying to yourself. That is where I came up short. I couldn't confront myself over some of that.
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So I'm sitting around repeating Trypophobia because a few minutes ago I couldn't say it right. TrypophobiaTrypophobiaTrypophobiaTrypophobiaTrypophobia. I'm saying it correctly now.
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He personified garbage, the way he debated; he embodied garbage, the way he behaved toward others; he personalized garbage, the way he abused and neglected women; he was garbage.
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Father O'Malley indeed hastened to pour holy water down the writhing girl's throat, unaware it was his vodka flask. "Shum more, pleash, fazher," begged the demon. "It's repenting!"
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How could I tell my parents about my lover? He was thousands of years old. Purple-skinned. And VERY touchy-feely. Yes, that's right. He was.. Barney the Dinosaur. They would be
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Tim Simon was walking home thinking about making a dental appointment when he walked into the wrong future. The future he walked in wasn't even his. Tim didn't know this until he
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When Winny and Wesley went shopping in Worcester on Wednesday, Winny asked Westely an unfortunate question. "Does this fireman's helmet make me look hot?" Wesley fainted. Again, wh
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The end of the line was what was waiting for Winny Willowly when she wished the witch closure.
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The sound of the electricity is loud tonight. There was a time when a man cold go black & white or greyscale if he wanted. Lie on a bed in some motel in the desert & wait for the
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Oh, wait, everyone already knows that the secret to everlasting happiness is writing folds. what else can I use as an enticement for attracting 100 likes?