Finished Folds (481—500)
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6That was how the Hatfields spent every Christmas. Absolving themselves of responsibility for the 200+ year feud with the McCoys. Eventually egg nog led to corn liquor and
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4For it was a Contour Sleep Number Bed, adjusted perfectly to his preferences. His slumber was deep and prolonged. At length he awoke to the sound of
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3scale Rapunzel's tower without benefit of her follicles? Could he really be Spider Man after all? Or was it simply
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2but to be his friend you have to get used to his penchant for carrying large statues of the new Speaker of the House. Eventually we ended up at the ferris wheel where
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1"I Cam Belieb In Na Butter." Oh! My! God! It was Fabio! For years she had imagined sharing a romance novel cover photo life with the ersatz Italian. Champagne, margarine, and
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2Now they were seated next to him, each having a Tarrytown cigarette. Soon the big one spoke. So, we meet again, Mr. Graves. I thought I told you to
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5A pastiche of bad haircuts, overflowing ashtrays, and empty gin bottles interspersed with suicidal faces. I was one with the word processor. 2500 words. Then 5000.
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1Ahab, for the hold was filled with hornets, and his girl had kicked their nest. Now they flew as one, intent on filling the grizzled sailor with their venom. Thinking quickly, he
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0But their hot little hands started to melt the bumpy surface of the chocolate, revealing peanuts, caramel, and fudge. Oh, Henry I cried, why hast thou forsaken me? What did I do?
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5No goiter would get in the way of his seeing her inner beauty. He'd see her over the cubicle wall, and his heart would skip a beat. He'd share his sandwich, and later his bed.
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3Passion pulsed poignantly past points prescribed. Presently, pubic parts parted pantaloons. Pulses plumed, private parts peaked, prescient pants plummeted.
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1Madonna had taken to wearing blue shawls and an angelic expression. She had reclaimed her virginity like the first Elizabeth. Suddenly chaste was in Vogue.
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4Millie sat beneath the sycamores, trying to escape the heat of a hot Savannah night. Lightning bugs flashed in the night sky. Her lemonade glass was empty. Beau was 20 minutes late
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3Land, ho, cried the pirate. But the flying prostitute paid no mind. She wanted a way out of her life, and only Richard Gere could provide it. Gere captained the tug, and was
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6All seven circles were burning. Sinners were running for their lives. About sixty of them got a battering ram and broke the gate back into Purgatory. You wouldn't believe the crowd
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5kilt him. He blowed up like a balloon, till he could barely squeeze hisself through one of them double doors down the Winn Dixie. He'da popped like the Hindenburg iffin he'd kep
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36his air valve was covered in lipstick. At last she rose and left her beloved inner tube to lie peacefully. And she promised herself she would never tire again.
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3The bodies were charred beyond recognition. So the coroner's report read simply that the crime scene was battery.
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9from a birthing pod. And then another. And another. Which goes to show that nothing, not even blizzard winds, can keep up with the Joneses.
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2get two for $20 according to that nice man from northern exposure. All he needed was a date and some wheels. He called Lurleen and she arrived in ten minutes, coupon in hand.