Finished Folds (2301—2320)
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2Fortunately, Dumbledore's goo had magical healing powers, and Harry's scar was gone forever. Now he didn't feel so self-conscious when they took pictures for the Hogwarts yearbook.
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3then I just bust a nut and think of something interesting, like when I was doing the edging on Mr. Bean's front lawn. Yeah, it was cool, but landscaping wasn't all fun and games.
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1They had to be Kosher - what Jew in their right mind wouldn't eat a juicy, beer-soaked cheeseburger with Krispy Kreme buns? Then Homer remembered he wasn't Jewish, so whatever.
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2Or metaphorically compare it to a 24-karat that you bought a mamacita who refuses to wear it.
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1Okay, so maybe the Bible Channel and CNN3 weren't exactly "mainstream," but his God-loving article made some serious waves when it was parodied by The Onion News Network.
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2, all the way out the door and down the street. It was as if the Gucci purse had come alive! It then found a job because, like all purses, it loved to be filled with money.
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2for a cheeseburger. KITT made sarcastic comments about the state of David's career, but the Hoff payed it no mind - he had a McDouble to eat.
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5And who can blame him - Swedish Fish are delicious (he was under the false impression that they had the omega-3's of real fish, but that's the type of advice you get on WebMD).
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2who was wearing his Sidney Crosby jersey. A creche of penguins, armed with 5-irons and various cudgeling paraphernalia, surrounded him. Luckily, Chief had brought his trusty
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0"We don't want this virus to spread," said Nurse Joy, as she injected the resistors with a purplish antibiotic. But I was not amused - I wanted Charmander to have the Pokérus.
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3Unwittingly, he had created a new genre of music that would plague college radio stations, iPods, and frat houses for years to come: Country Rap.
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4the mallet at Chuck, but an Acme crate landed on me. This being a cartoon, I was covered in phallic-ish lumps and X-shaped bandages. When I peered into the crate, I saw
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1and her fishbowl. As water, pebbles, and a little purple castle crashed into the floor, Oedipus's mom finally followed through on her threat - she signed him up for Boy Scouts.
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0we melted the ice, and the cows sank into the water. "Cows can't swim," I said, puffing out my chest. At least, I thought they couldn't. But then I heard a distinct moo, and
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3hard work and positive thinking, but to each his own. Besides, he inspired the boy to become a dragon trainer on Salamandastron, a faraway volcano ruled by fluffy
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6nothing; salmon don't talk, so I guess that made sense. But then I saw something that really made no sense - it was a talking waffle. I readied my spear as the waffle said,
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3But I did anyway. As I entered the gates of hell, I was greeted by Beelzebozo, the devil's clown. He asked me to become his hairdresser. I wish I had declined, because then he
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1That was, until the Mustard Demon broke into my house. Who was I gonna call, Ghostbusters? No. Today was the Sabbath, and they were a God-fearing bunch. So I grabbed a spork and
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4Once upon another time, I rode my pet dragon, Debbie, all the way up to my roof. I needed to fix a leak, and my ladder had broken, so she was especially helpful. That was, until
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2nothing interesting. He invited me over to play mini golf, but I couldn't take him up on his offer - me and the dwarf were hurdling through space-time on our way to