Finished Folds (2941—2960)

• 1
  had taken a vow of silence when she entered the nunnery. Now known as Sister Smurfette, she was sent to Africa to hassle Africans into stop being so annoyingly poor.

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:42:41

• 5
  nutrients from the thoughts of small minded people? I loved my new life as a symbiote. Angry thoughts are chewy, annoyance is crunchy but my favourite - boredom- is buttery and

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:39:54

• 5
  the usual shenanigans. The Janitor Impersonators shook their mops at the encroaching Chinese junks and held their red buckets to shield themselves from the flaming arrows raining

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:33:49

• 5
  The disembodied voice said " Shoes are currently unavailable for small dog feet. Press 2 for donkeys.Press 3 for..." I bellowed at the world and threw the telephone into the porrid

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:27:41

• 9
  Lucifer, spotting an opportunity, refurbished Hell in neutral colours with matching throws and brushed steel fittings. The snit-throwers loved it and lived happily ever after.

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:20:19

• 6
  I got out of the bathroom and away from the mirror with its never ending questions I do no know. But now I was confused and late for the train to Liverpool Street station to meet

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:09:22

• 5
  Ice Beast, although a raging maniac in freezing temperatures, suffered low self esteem in temperate climates. The editor at the Times slammed the copy on the desk and snarled in

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:04:46

• 6
  my chamber by coming to bed in THOSE socks?" Dulcinea climbed out of bed hissing that of all the men in Manchuria, she had to end up with me. I felt aggrieved and a little bit

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 06:00:43

• 6
  Being colour blind, I couldn't tell the difference so climbed up the ladder out of the blue hall and straight into a madium sized mall. Good job too as me slacks were tight due to

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:55:26

• 7
  "Cher," I ground out through gritted teeth, "I'd love to talk weaves and hair extensions, but I've got a plate of coq au vin with my number on it. Hasta la vista!" I cracked the

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:48:28

• 2
  Dolphins can get eczema if they worry overly about pretty much anything. " Eeeeeeeeee'" squeaked the dolphin as many hands caressed its itchy body with paraffin. 'Thank God for

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:44:24

• 4
  picked a peck of pickled pepper and fingered his garrotte and flick knife. Peter Piper pulled on his balaclava and absailed off the top of the building to smash through the window

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:40:41

• 1
  Stealing over him as the Dorkus Limpet wobbled and tumbled from its plinth, crashing into his leg causing compound fractures. Would he ever carve a Dorkus Limpet again without usin

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:18:24

• 2
  he couldn't shake off his love of clams, no matter how hard he tried. Father Walrus picked up the tiny clam, kissed it tenderly and dashed a tear from his eye. His voice cracked as

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:10:13

• 7
  and I had an overwhelming urge to kiss her neck mouth, her nose eyes... The Interplanetary Waiter interrupted with 2 dishes of green belch fluid. She lifted the spoon to her neck

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-23 05:01:46

• 6
  He was a Greek waiter, she was an English tourist on the mythical isle of Lesbos. They communicated in broken German and the International Language of Love. Georgios pulled his

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-22 18:26:17

• 0
  the Ex-lax guy backed a truck of pig slurry into the living room. Two foot tide mark of scum on the wall - we might have to redecorate. Charlie an me crept out of

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-22 18:01:31

• 3
  wanted to kill all those Facebook bunnies with their happy photos and cheery existences. That was when I started stockpiling cyanide and collecting Nazi memorabilia. What would

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-22 17:51:33

• 3
  Pain and regret. His wife became president, of course. The day he got the call from her he'd been digging his own grave in the garden. She told him she wanted him back. She gasped

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-22 17:47:31

• 5
  problem decking the whole lot of them. Years of talking about sex had given Dr Ruth impressive powers of endurance. She put her teeth in, shook her grey locks back and felt the

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  lucielucie

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  2013-02-22 17:41:55