Finished Folds (601—620)
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4and put them in his pocket which already contained marbles, a Darth Vader Pez dispenser, a tuning fork and some beef jerky. Detective Manatee always carried marbles in his pocket
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8who implanted a device that could put his heart on mute.It had several side effects.Whenever he muted his heart, he became a douche bag cross between Doug Anthony Hutchinson and
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4Dammit! I shouldn’t have fallen asleep reading The Hunger Games! I climbed a tree and surveyed my dreamscape teen adversaries: a skinny guy with really bad acne smoking weed,
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5meant his car would be at the shop for 28 Days. He’d just taken a valium when Amelie, his Fatal Attraction, smashed his Rear Window with a Brick, shouting, “I’m Gonna Git You Sucka
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5with a pouch. The Kangol hat was no problem, but a fanny with a pouch would take serious cash. I took out a 401K loan and made an appt. with Joan Rivers' plastic surgeon because
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62.I resolve to carry no less than an unregistered Glock-17 to fend off all mofos that may attempt to relieve me of my rucksack of ill-gotten gains,hence, purifying the gene pool.3.
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5One confused penguin waddled too close to the edge and fell on Kanye West in the front row. He threw it back into the boxing ring, knocking the other penguins down like bowling pin
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4I’m not putting on that clown suit.You don’t have to apprentice as a clown before you can be a Mall Santa! Clowns creep kids out.Remember what happened last week at Timmy’s birthda
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4No, there's no audience, just you, me and the video camera....I think I want to stage a reading from Th-....What? You'll be home at 0-drunk-thirty....What's that supposed to mean?
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5He got tangled in the tub stopper chain and accidentally drowned. The misfortune he'd hung on to fell in the street when the EMTs took him away. It was picked up by a squirrel
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3the government was quietly turning lions into rocket fuel. It all makes sense since seeing Apollo 18. The moon is infested with alien rocks with legs and we need to kill them
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3erables was burning thru cash like Mickey Rourke thru plastic surgeries.It seemed like a good idea at the time: African gorilla living in Paris sewer steals banana and candlesticks
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4Sue,” said Dr. Phil “I respect your right to own a bazooka, please respect my right to not have it pointed at my face, and to give you some folksy advice:don't swim in Lake Jackass
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4Wainscottings," said another, looking at the wall.Still surveying their surroundings for new mascot ideas, another board member said,"How about the Condoms?" as she rummaged in her
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9Samuel L. Jackson could still get the point across: “Strap your <CENSORED> asses in and hang onto your plates, I'm shooting out windows to get rid of these <CENSORED> snakes!"
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1L.A. He decided we’d live like the gypsy family on the defunct TV series The Riches.As we pulled up to the newest house I said “Daddy it looks just the American Horror Story House
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1And became the famous Honey Badger on You Tube. Because only half his karmic slate had been wiped clean, he was captured by Quentin Tarantino and
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3It was tied to the big toe of a guy passed out under the kitchen table with a wrinkled note in one hand and Stoli in the other. This must’ve been some party! Still hungover, I
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10the concrete under my prison slippers, snuggling under the thin cotton blanket on my lumpy mattress, and hearing my number at roll call. I would be home again.
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2cted trouble.The ninja turtles explained they were mutants.The Lion King threw up in his mouth a little.Charlotte said she was an arachnid and had no meat. All eyes turned to Porky