But luckily for me, I am John The John man, and I can make things trend. I grabbed my kazoo, called upon the power of the mighty U-Kazoo, god of Kazoos, and asked him, may I have

an extremely painful death, or maybe even get eaten by a rabid sea chipmunk. (It is a serious threat you know. Sea chipmunks are very deadly.) So I had to get to land. But of cour-

crowd, which of course came from his supernatural nipples. Jack Curt started crying in Russian, and ran out of the building, to astonished fans, and had a tragic flashback of when

the unspeakable event. The one that killed my great uncle Daphné, and drove my second cousin Fredrica insane. The event that I mean is, of course, the 2019 Naruto fest. It happened

For her pixie sticks, which she always carries around forty of, she has diabetes, you see, and took one and started munching. I only noticed cause she groaned while she was bending

Name of Bigfoots little toe also, which he had wowed her with on many a night. The court case was an absolute disaster. First they had to prove he exists, then prove he'd raped her

Had nails embedded in them. As more of them pierced their way into my buttocks, I became more shoe than man. I decided I'd place a ankle rubbing curse on the class.

proboscis across the table and deposited the fashionably thin semi-conductor onto Robbie's plate. "Danger! Danger, Hathaway!" croaked Robbie as he waved his arms unenthusiastically

tried to put my arm around him for a chummy pose, but Jamie shrank from me unexpectedly. "Sorry, I don't do selfies unless I do them myself," he said before turning to run away.

Blister Boy and Seemingly Sasquatch Man knew The Trapezing Trombonist gang were too much for them on their own, so they had to assemble an ensemble of all their superhero friends.

the nearest empty cage. I glanced around with an unimpressed look on my face. The cage was cleaner than I'd expected, but it was rather cramped and the floor was concrete. "No," I

emptiness assaulted her every sense. It was as if a thick, black, velvet curtain had descended across the land, smothering anything that produced light or sound. April threw her

piece of paper with a URL scribbled onto it. Mark typed the address into his smartphone and was soon watching a home video of Rex the dog, sitting in the office chair with paws on

sold like hotcakes at an all animal revue or traveling Chautauqua. They looked just like regular rocks but their quietness had been fortified with Factor X. At $20 a gram, it was a

like a Mozhan being looked at and Zochar hated him for that. Since the Party line was that hate didn't exist I told himself it wasn't hate then. Him being a Party man all the way.

about I soak those breadsticks in lye for you and then sprinkle some sawdust on top of your tofu brains?" Ms Prescilla caressed the waiter with his long nails. The waiter lost his

killer and only he knew what constituted a psycho. People avoided him in case they fit his definition of a psycho for that day. He was only about one thing; being a psycho killer.

the ruin he had made of Piglet's guest toilet. For a Bear with Big Brain, Pooh sure was stupid when it came to these things. He could claim it was like this when he came in or Owl

bunch of Negro platters where wishing their shoes were fireproof. We didn't have time for those drifters either. The hobgoblins were on our tails. The pretenders took our semblence

was whammo, homie. It spilled thrills beyond my will's will to transform that fast. The moment dropped me like a hot sweet potato who was too long in the rain without Calvinism.