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have angered the polar bears with our negligence of the environment, and as their territory has melted, they have evolved to be stronger, swim farther, and to desire vengeance."
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Fold it like the colossal seafaring vessel of the Norse gods, crafted by dwarves to condense to the size and portability of a handkerchief when traveling overland.
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too short a time in this world to be concerned with methods of transport to our certain death – we should focus our attention on cleanliness, warm water and golden bathtubs. Unless
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Tim spent the next week trying really, really hard to resist the urge to give Gary a high-five. But finally he snapped, and he delivered the best high-five in all of history! Even
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realized just how completely WEIRD my dreams had become. I went to see my psychotherapist, who immediately prescribed a regimen of Prozac and goat milk, possibly the two strangest
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-nched himself in petroleum and set himself ablaze, in a clumsy and ill-begotten attempt to carry out the general's orders. "Strange, I don't recall decreeing self-immolation," he
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numbers starting with two ones and increasing by their sums. The twist, which was twisted in and of itself, was that Professor Fibonacci was grading on a scale of his own making.
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having a grilled cheese sandwich at midnight... with VELVEETA! Oh for shame! FoldingStory will forever be known as the Repository of Eternal Embarrassment. Woe is us, o folders of
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In fact, now thr would b no words at all that had th lttr "" in thm. It was as though th shaman had control ovr th univrs itslf! "What powr is this that you wild? To rmov a lttr fr
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For two, she left him. Three, she became a trucker and drove across the country to pick up a load of heavy machinery, which she would then ship all the way to Alaska. Four,
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after which there was a mass uprising of bean counters and chili enthusiasts who rebelled against the government's war on legumes. "WE WILL NOT BE HAS-BEANS!" Not exactly the best
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ho ho! Merry Christmas!" At least, that's what Santa USED to say, until that one fateful Christmas eve when not even Rudolph's bright, glowing nose could break through the fog. It
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was the lesser-known younger cousin of Mister Mxyzptlk. Hicduk Gghlx always wanted to take on Superman in a battle of wits, but he just couldn't compete with Mxyzptlk's brand of
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Trader Joe called the cops and had me arrested for trespassing. I suppose that checks out. And just like that, my dream of kidnapping TJ went up in smoke, along with my pants. Oh
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a hot dog as a joystick. That's odd, I thought to myself. What kind of game would make you use a delicate piece of food as a control mechanism? I decided to investigate the article
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in my hands. I had to let them fall into a shot glass instead. It was ironic, in a way. Mom always joked about saving our tears for later use. Now her strange sense of humor rang
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at the corner of Hodgely and Bacchus. That hospital sucks. I'd leave a zero-star review if I could, but Google and Yelp both force you to give at least one star. Instead, I gotta
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its most recognizable parts, like its head and hands. It was very strange indeed. Kind of like one of those nightmares that you can't awake from. Perhaps I was dreaming? I couldn't
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Just gonna let it slide, just like a baseball bunt // Oh, you just can't see, what the hell is wrong with me // But when the time is right, we'll bunt balls into the night // Oh oh
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Custer just looked at the guy like he had lobsters coming out of his ears. "Say again? Something about Lulu Muzzle Tough?" It was hard being a starship commander when your crew did