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ly nights were freezing cold in the outback. My sleeping bag was thick and warm, but I slept in fuzzy socks, a wool jumper and a beanie. No pants, though. My cocoon of warmth lead
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ng she'd been standing there. It was as if she were a tree, or a strange art installation. "Ma'am," I shouted, "are you okay?" "Of course I'm bloody well not!" she shrieked back.
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ie roll. There are kids around for crying out loud." the Owl angrily hooted. A small boy came over, curious to know how to get his own tootsie roll from his tootsie roll pop.
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the TSA's bad taste in hiring cultists, and so the Passengers decided to make their own group titled: "Tomato Slugging Apes." And the new group could slug everyone with tomatoes.
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get to fast enough. Sarratigo, you see, could only go as fast as a tortoise in a relay race against the hare. Still, the hare didn't watch where he was going, and slipped on a
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the Cheshire cat who'd just eaten the rabbit. (The one who was always late). "Na-noo, na-noo" someone said. Robin Williams' face fell. "Hey," he said. "I may be dead but that joke'
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load. I scratched my brain again. This brain-scratching thing was becoming a habit, I mused. I wonder why I didn't do that before? Oh! Sweet Epiphany. Uh cuz of the helmet!
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If only Kasper could remember the rest. It seems like a chunk of his memory is missing.. What did she do to him last time?
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what I was looking for, so if something else happened in there when I was in there I didn't see it or them or her. It was probably a her. Nobody ever looks for me unless there is a
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I deemed what I was going to say too racist and I admonished myself over it and I was contrite. I saw what I was after but this wasn't the right story for it. I won't tell you if t
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It is a conundrum. What part is reasonable precaution and what part is the paranoia? The threshold is going to be passed at some point here. They need to know that we've made conti
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idea, considering Raylene often thought her thoughts into explosions. Teddy knew, though, that the machine would finally stop the constant telepathy.
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spaghetti sauce, and the Rice a Roni alarm clock won’t stop until you bake it. Let’s just hope the water powered smoke alarm doesn’t go off with sprinkles again.
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His bs ran a mile long, long enough to fill the planet Bathroom several embarrassing and life-threatening times, considering that Barry the bull had explosive diarrhea.
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on foot anyways, but considering he was stuck on the bottom of a shoe, he stuck to it and hoped he could get stuck to the sidewalk long enough to enjoy the scenery.
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If 1 is the greatest number to have, then why is 100 better on scoring on a math test rather than scoring a 1? But when you win as 1 rather than 100 in a relay race, why does it m
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I ate a takoyaki chimichanga and wrote a message on Deadpool’s hidden napkin message. “Walmart ate the last chimichanga mixed with takoyaki without you.”
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This isn’t how I wanted to spend Christmas, under the blistering sun without even a lemonade to cool me off on July 4th.
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You know.. I voted George Washington for president for year 2016... on the Sample BALLOT! I wish I had written it on the real one.
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Nincompoops, Ne’er- do-wells, and Nags! Let’s go get some Death Eater partyyyyyyyyyyyyy-