These godsouls were passing by this world, let’s call it earth. For some reason or other, family might’ve been involved, whatever, the godsouls get stuck in human meat pods. Making

Cecil of Cecit's Crab Shack has repeatedly asked me to not dress up in a lobster costume and stand in front of his restaurant. I'm on a public sidewalk being lobstery. Big whoop.

should find me a woman who is all of these and more. Instead I keep finding nice girls who value my kindness and always claim they didn't cheat on me when I know that they did. Not

The LSD they had dozed the eensy-weensy had it see itself as a bigsy-wigsy worthy of having enemies that might hire assassins to squash it. The air horn sounding that close scared

It didn't fit. I wasn't looking to get attitude from my own attitude. "Et tu attitudus", I quipped to my persona non gratta who was frying up quail's eggs in pork fat over the camp

Everybody has the one person that they never include in that category made up of those we must keep a secret from. If I swear to not tell anybody that you blew a dog, Sven is going

You were never meant to be a contender. Not really. Even Dad knew it, in spite of what he said about it. You've got the heart of a champion but the fists of a barista. We're wrong.

We wore what they told us not to wear because they wanted us to feel like we had a choice in the matter. We didn't, they owned the competitor as well. They won either way, but you,

His first book, WRITE A STUPID BOOK, MAKE MONEY, was a blockbuster success. Millions of his 2nd book, THE STUPIDER BOOK, STILL COLLECTING, had already been burned in protest of his

I breathed with the drum, pulsed with the heart. I did none of this but it was done by me as someone else. Somebody I shared the shade & shadows with. Not really a friend, although

general contractors were almost on par for a headache. Tiny Terry saw how women had this awesome power & why the patriarchy was hell bent on pushing this shit through. His children

They had a new dancer/singer there that night by the name of Pearl. Big Brother & the Holding Company and Daddy G were not there because of her but they are glad they were. Drake

I might have gotten the order wrong but I did all three. At least give me credit for that. I wasn't the only one on this sinking ship. I didn't see you down in the keel swimming in

I was being hypnotized by a fleet of wood macaroni and cheese packing peanuts who needed a host body, presumably me. FM radio came to my senses then to my defense. I tuned in, drop

with equanimity but with insistence. A girl's life was at stake. "Stop being a Karen, Karen, Be a Manger for the sake of this girl's life" said the guy they'd cut in front of. "Ok,

bring him a DVD of the last episode of Game of Thrones so that my Uncle Carl can warn those innocents living in the mid 60s about that Winter is coming. But the cosmic snow sent me

-in Timberlake stepped up to help me. Unbeknownst to us, Justin was a droid, too. "He says he has a bomb that will incinerate all biological life. Sucks to be you!" said Justin as

I am talking to you George Washington. You're the first President of this wet fart. So you better set a fine example for the job. Imagine what the 16th or 45th President might take

the eye socket of a dead pirate that was climbing up the side of the ship below him. He gulped and restacked the remaining donut, straightened his kit & stepped into the madness.

I know that I am still putting it out there but you should consider doing a different story. This one is not ready for you. Move along you. Oh not you, you're the one the story was