wouldn't be found in her nether parts. She should stop trying to make US happen. I wanted to be civil about it. "What, in verbal gymnastics, is equivalent to a roundhouse kick?" An

rake and ne'er do well who had anonymously sired several of the Vandals and Visigoths. Paedrick listened to the Vandals' complaints with half an ear, while contemplating more

The US Marshalls arrived to collect the perp. "Let us see who Governor Desantis really is," Daphne said. At this Fred ripped the governor's face off. "Typhoid Mary," Velma gasped.

of a Lombard still fighting Justinian's Ostrogoth campaign. He was inspecting Nick to determine if he was friend or foe. Nick didn't know why the heavily armed homeless guy was giv

triumvirate of the day had left instructions that Quirfhagbae was to be kept sedated with milk of the poppy. Each claim of omnipotence was noted. As were claims of having invented

In the early days of Martian colonization, on average, 1 in 8 arkship was lost to mutiny brought on by the monotony of space travel at the time. What had been known as cabin fever

Albondigas Canales was a guy that I never met or ever heard mentioned until I mentioned him just now. You can image what kind of guy he was. I'll wait.

her oddly shaped dice. They looked like moving fingers to me. I couldn't tell what my Earthborn granddaughter was trying to tell me when she said, "The runes are against you Papa."

Chris told Pat, "I'll be the boy." Pat looked at Sam, rolled her eyes, and answered Chris with, "I'll be me, heh, heh, heh." Sam explained to Marion, "Nudge nudge, wink wink." He

I reached over to grab it. He watched my hand grab the handle of my bucket in his hand and didn't do anything. Like he didn't release it. When I tugged on it the moron punched me.

Inspector Manovwar was putting the final nails to the mystery of the missing potatoes when he was hit by an idea and died instantly. The Capuchin monkeys flung en masse their Bacon

than those times I traded sex for food inside the dumpster behind the Wiggly Piggly. That was survival this stinky ass sofa is decor. I decided to dump the sofa out of state. Texas

banister into Prof. Higgins' library. Where she ended up sprawled over the Devil's Bible that she had knocked over in her descent. The flames in the book singed her. "Pain, refrain

a dream that wasn't one of mine. I knew it wasn't my dream and I was trying to get out out of it. But I couldn't figure out who the dreamer was. Getting kicked out was the goal. Of

He crumpled the paper hot dog dish and threw it onto the back seat. Where it joined several other paper hot dog dishes and assorted fast food wrappers. Her memory was there too. Of

a small plastic bull that I kept in my breast pocket, just in case. But when their henchman grabbed me by the lapels, he cracked it, and it ran all over my Armani suit. They kicked

How I managed to have a 3-year-old granddaughter at the age of one, I'll never tell. Let's just say I have a thing for older women. How the little dickens knew that I shouldn't

You know what they say: Big feet, big ...er...heart. Everywhere I went, women ogled my clown shoes and winked. Chad had to strip all the way down to get any attention, but all I

Wanda the Anaconda was wondering when Gwen and Glen would wet their whistles with whisky. Why worry wantonly when waste not want not. The wretched wizard wise guy Westly went west.

The 1st time I died wasn't all BAM then float away softly like all the others say it was for them. In fact, none of my deaths have ever been like that. Sarge says I invest too much