refused to let go of Miley's legs. She finally just left her pants behind and climbed on the wrecking ball buck naked. I still have those jeans and panties somewhere in the barn.

ion like another John with a short fuse, which he was. He lambasted the audience for falling for the fake John. Nothing is as simple as being just porcelain. He, like all of us,

I asked the Cosmic Consciousness to consign me to the brig but they refused. "Look CC," I said. "I know you know who I am so you know that I am good for it. Come on CC, cut me some

I heard thunder and I thought, "could the thought bring the thunder?" To test this theory I needed an Earth like Planet that was spherical and located in a perfect vacuum. I asked

I think where I was going with this one. Probably down some sordid street in forbidden knowledge. I don't know. Perhaps a maybe is in store for my future. It could happen. I guess.

Really got over the mountain in her red pajamas but she came! Oh man, she came alright. She came down like an avalanche and buried all us sinners in her slime. Make way for the Who

when they were kids because when Petro had kicked him in the ass it had felt like three toes not five. Petro has been "Three-toed" ever since. A wise guy can't just retire & walk a

“What?! You couldn’t hold the humpback?! “I’m telling you Captain, that whale is the Devil! We barely escaped with our lives.” The Captain knew Starbuck was right but damn! They al

I like my pickles crisp and she refused ever see that. I held my arms open to her. Would she buy it this time? “What color is my hat,” she asked me suddenly.

I just realized for the first time that Martin Guerre's wife must have known that wasn't Martin Guerre because his feet were smaller and if the feet are smaller the cock is too.

ted to the internet. Especially memes. This is extremely serious. I'm going to reccomed a 24 hour detox from all electronic devices"

"Have you put it through it's paces yet?" Maybe it wasn't a no-go after all. "Not yet. Are you volunteering," I asked him pregnantly. He smiled. He jostled the rack's handcuffs. I

said, "but I wish you could hear me, because then you could hear that Blue is a shape. That was a nice turnaround, by the way. You might not hear the melody of your voice, but

Then I realized that they were from a dimension where Omar Peck never invented the steigle device. My pity for them was immense. They might as well be single celled organisms.

It was his mistake to give me my layoff slip only an hour into my shift on Christmas Eve. I walked out and left him alone to fend off the last minutes shoppers. Their desperation

That turned out to be wrong when Manatee turned the note around to find out it had been written on the back of an instant picture of Boingeaux the Clown being murdered by Crazo the

booger from his right nostril and flicked it on the alien’s shoes. “Why bowling?” the Alien asked, kicking the booger back onto Rev. Chuck. “Ralph Kramden, Ed Norton, The Dude

so they could film their documentary, but they failed, and the house was demolished. Five billion dollars of occult equipment went with it.

team! Well, you will when we come and rescue you! Hang on tight and we'll get you out of that precarious spacecraft in a jiffy! Marietta, out!"

"Well, I was a baby when I was born. It's not like I can remember all of the details..." I chuckled weakly, but the immigration officer's glare only intensified.