night where his name came from because it sounded like a Liontaur name. He told me he was orphaned on the streets of Tarna, but with the help of a talking mop and a damp squid, he

was popular with the serial killers that comprise 4chan. Regrettably, the animal abuse website came up when he did a search for "naked men lying on faux fur rugs". Because Google.

Still unable to explain their mistaken identity, Pichard placated the Ghonadian Ambassador with naked lady drawings with nude mammaries, which were in the Enterprise's database.

The bed of nails was tempting him. Then the turkey jumped on with its baggage and it never happened the way I'm telling it. Not because anything it said or did or even represented.

they did as instructed. They walked out of the door & found a patch of grass. Now what? They had all walked out before the next part of the instructions could appear. Which was Be

test test test test test …, after the umpteenth to the power of umpteenth tests it has been determined that ice has no bones. The bone you found in your ice isn't the ice's bone.

and Nemo on sitar they would while the time away while the Nautilus navigated itself around the bottom of the Mariana Trench. Nemo suspected a path lay therein to Thule. Their jazz

Here, have some e-food bought with your imaginary e-money. Enjoy this e-roof over your head. And have you ever noticed airline peanuts always leave the toilet seat up? Honk-honk!

an unleavened rye bread. What really got Little Debbie cooking was the sly tongue of Blutto. Blutto was her cousin Nancy’s fiancé. That man could talk the wet out of water. Still,

As pathetic as it seems, I’ve been given way too much credit for driving him insane. I haven’t had a license to do so since 1972, and even then, I tended to give him enough rope to

for shaking things up. The King additionally proclaims that any such pledges on the stone wall do not constitute stonewalling, meaning you must answer his questions immediately. No

script right out of her hands. "Well, now how am I going to memorize my lines? Thanks a lot!" The guy from the prop department said "Sorry!". Aunt Ariela stomped off stage and got

I mean, why did they stick me in here when I'm only mostly dead? Not all dead, mind you, but they did go through my pockets and look for loose change. It would take a miracle to

the creature's mouth, or at least what I believed was its mouth, and watched to see what would happen. Before long, the creature shrank to the size of a lima bean and rolled off my

starship captain could possibly win anything in his life, let alone a measly fifty-meter dash. He had more important things to do. But Harold sprinted, and he won. He had proved

of this sacred brew shall bestow upon you powers you cannot possibly comprehend. If you drink of it, you shall verily explode with a messiness never before witnessed by human eyes.

beginning to crumble away under my toes. I was the only one aware of the gradual erosion taking place since the planet's core had become a black hole. Nobody wanted to believe it,

Question 1: If a train leaves a station traveling 60 miles per hour eastward, and another train rockets into space at a quarter million miles per hour, who gets the last laugh?

and I don't learn anything,

in the shape of little golden pyramids decorated her shoes. She wore the same Gucci scent as Harry Styles. My job was to guide this nouveau cougar into a mutually beneficial