The Rule of thumb was thems with thumbs ruled. Charlie and his kind thought they could get by by taking the thumbs of others. Sorry Charlie. Purloined thumbs don’t make a tuna king

I finally convinced me that I was me. Me doesn't know that I'm not really me. Bwahaa haa hah hah.

the laundry racket in this dream & required you pay for your laundry with plastic sporks. That certain hallucinating someone was in my flesh again. Trying to convince me it was me.

The labels are still pending. I've been touched since the day I was born. I didn't know any different. I always assumed other people's experiences were similar to my own. When they

with his ability with words. The writer's wife is not a woman of words. She is a woman of caresses and for a barrage of tiny kisses on the small of her back. As her cabana boy, I

like, I just did, you'll wind up here, a textbox. You're limited to 180 characters. Your only clue on how to proceed is the previous sentence which you "inherited". Fold or kill.

You need to cell your sole two the Autocorrect Deity too please them. Dunt fourr get tu maik a sakrifise too da Speling Soul. Lastly. Grammar God please please the to be good luc

soul that is worthy to go to the gates of Valbuzza and be reincarnated as I ascend to my 4/5 life. Don't listen to those bozo bees who claim I'm kamakrazee, I am perfectly sane ho

Prof. Jentelbert detected strange signals coming from large networks of mycelium. The shrooms are up to something and Prof. J, after taking numerous shrooms, have decoded their pla

Perhaps a reverse seance is in order. Abyss gathered their family friends as they decorated the room with some cutesy mortal stuff like flowers and dogs. Mortals, I call upon thee

and tipped the hat. His body was rebuilt to match the average dream lover of everyone. He became they, they are now Chinese, and they have enough good looks to be treated as a

top of a highly active volcano. His so-called yurt was made of concrete and was reinforced with steel. He was often visited by troubled individuals who thought he was some sort of

She would urinate in every tree and or fire hydrant she finds and she gets her drool everywhere. We were a pussy family, not a bitch family, so we had to force our mother-in-law to

"Now look, you. Don't try to rope me into your twisted cosmoconception re: sick monkeys infected with fictions, because for one thing I'm not wearing monkey meat." Angus Chatterton

I put the email in Chaz's spam folder. Actually, I printed it out using a sensible font on reasonably priced paper, put it in a manila folder, and whirled it into his in-basket.

Eridani Neruda, grandson of Captain Nemo, let the remaining human crew off the Nautilus during Ibiza's off-season, then got far away from the topside crazies. Under the sea

And then somehow the mysteries of my provenance, the travails I had endured, and the stupidities of the present day all resolved themselves into

I got a job running dirty laundry from a restaurant in Manhattan, Uncle Joey’s Pasta e Fagioli, to a well-respected Industrial Cleaning Facility in South Hackensack, New Jersey.

the contents of their pants. But he was not that kind of people. He could not be bought with mere money. He wanted an island all his own. So he looked for the trendiest mansion, an

"Hold it, Commander," said Private Hurdblather, "If you are me, then who am I talking to?" "Stop talking to yourself, scumbag," said his boss, "I'll be glad to get out into the war