layed limp on the ground, till its breath became air. The fair maiden was thrilled that the fight was over and turned to our hero who was holding a

The crowd was shocked. They look toward the Disco Clown and realized that he float to the air.

I couldn't help but go. I was so weak, falling for her sweetness like that and yearning to taste her so much. She was flitting towards me, looking like an angel, while I was

and then I'd fall asleep mid-sentence due to not having had enough coffee to see me through the performance. The spectacle, of course, was to see how far I could get before I

Oh, it would be a great day when he found this Shangri-La of enlightenment. He could leave this God-forsaken world behind and join a new chorus of ideas and pure information, where

which wasn't actually wrong, but was just different from what everyone was expecting him to do. How can something be wrong when the rules haven't been clearly defined? You might

was taking a nap. All those reports I filled out drained me. I woke up weeks later feeling like I was enchanted or something. Some brassy sounds waft through my room. It sounded li

somewhere along the way, my prostate installed a virus, which eventually corrupted my entire reproductive system. Soon, my genitals were stealing everyone's identities and hacking

Freedom! Miss Piggy executed the Karate Chop of Freedom upon her geriatric rainbow-connecting Muppet and was instantly whisked off to the magical land of Marionettes, where

swandive into the splendiforous portal of silliness that is FoldingStory, heart open, eyes full, loins gyrating. So how am I doing so far? Have I given you enough juicy words to

rupture in spacetime that I could investigate? Which dimension would it send me to? The evil grocer would of course want me to stay, but if I were to just reach into that void,

the oversized fungal masses to ride bikes. They don't even have to learn how to bike without training wheels. It's just tricycles. And if the sun rises a degree to the left tomorro

. And if he did crash, he couldn't die. And if he did die, he couldn't go to Hell. And if he did go to hell, he couldn't meet the Devil. It was all in the contract. So, as one does

of intelligent agriculture will pull at their heartstrings. Imagine having a conversation with your corn before eating it! How romantic. I'm willing to invest two billion into

and without warning something ordinary happened and I was on cruise control the whole time and missed it. A car passed slowly past my house. Jimmy Hoffa was in the back seat. Where

and then we went back to speaking in English. So anyway, I was saying something about pistons and contrails, but I think that was just a bit of a fever dream. It's kinda too bad,

few years later, she finally managed to lift herself off the ground. Ironically, it was harder than it should have been because the additional muscle mass made her quite a bit heav

with outdated software. A cucumber inserted strategically into my left ear will perform a factory reset on my brain, and then I can download a newer frontal lobe and update my

said the Succinct Pirate. "r m8e! Wut ye be doin on me shp?" The Verbose General replied, "Well, sir, I have dutifully boarded your vessel, which I must say is an amazing piece of

you, boo.” I thanked him for his time and talent and tenaciously tiptoed into the torrential rain. I looked up into the sky and screamed, “I DO ME, BOO!” Just then,