The coroner drops the brain onto the scale. Scribbles a note. "Well?" asks Det. Manatee, munching on a celery stick. The coroner shuts his notebook. "Erototoxin overdose." He takes

"I'm a fountain of blood, in the shape of a girl!' screamed Björk. "All is full of love! My name's Isobel!" This was the worst yet - nothing could contain her as she raved and

The whistle sounded. The girls leg went back to strike it. This was it. I only had to make this one save and we were the champs. I took a deep breath and watched as the ball flew.

Anyone who might have glanced my way would think nothing of me walking through the neighborhood in the morning. It was a school day and kids carry bags to school all the time.

Are bleach and chlorine the same thing? Is there a difference, besides need for water, between turtles and tortoises? What IS the most annoying sound in the world? Also,

"I bet I can shed faster than you," said the snake. "Not so!" said the blue crab. As they speed-molted, Aesop rolled his eyes. Animals would try anything to star in his next Fable.

Outside the 'Pizza Palace' 2 innocent takeawayers are approached by Robin Hobo: "I am here to liberate those pizzas, ladies, and give them to hobos. Now, hand them over."

It was the prince who killed the dogs, not the servant. But the servant got blamed, of course!

We used to ride our bikes through the abandoned transmat docks, among rusty girders, phasing freight containers and veils of shimmering screams. One time at night Jimmy rode

Since the ice storm is going 2hit,I grabbed my grocery list and went 2 the store. The list was torn &wet, so I did my best to read it. OhMan. 1. Thumbtax, or was it Tampax?

If i tell you why i have six toes on my left foot, then will you sleep with me, she asked my friends and I.

She was unsure of her date and even more unsure about being outside, so she peed on his heated leather seats and waited while it cured in, insurance against future dates.

"Rub-a-dub-dub, Three men in a tub, and how do you think they got there?" Mr Porter scowled and blacked out "men in a tub".

The longer I looked at it, the bigger it seemed to get. I tried to look away, but couldn't for at least half a minute. Then I looked again. It moved. It seemed to stretch, but I

A sweet and precocious girl age 7 wrote "i know how the sun shines... it's a ball of fire." in a folding story. It didn't ft and she was branded a troll. "Is there a better way?"

The Cypriot Prime Minister was thinking. He could a) let the country go bankrupt; b) suffer a bizarre Polonium 210 death at the hands of a disgruntled Russian depositor; c) no c

Sausages. He could never shut up about sausages. They were his life ever since

A moral end to my story would be a surprise,so when SlimWhitman was able to do it during a game of "chaz",I was amazed that being a 49er faithful fan he still voted for Nixon.Black

She watched the purple mist rise off the trees and wondered how long the rock where she squatted would hold. She slowly reached a tentacle out, thinking, "Well, at least it isn't

I first read Atlas Shrugged when I was a depressed teen, oppressed by the mere existence of my parental units. Who could have predicted that I'd grow up to lead