Finished Folds (81—100)
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6cher whose fastball strayed into the stands & split the farmer's head open ended up walking the hitter, which cost their team the game. But they were allowed to keep the ball, so…
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5& tempers flared. Finally, NASA counter attacked with an IPBM (Inter Planetary Bowel Movement). The aliens were touched, & thanked earthlings "..for the thoughtful bouquet!". They
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3I took it for granted the nerds' altruism was out of love for science, but then they asked me to attend an orgy. It turns out their idea of it is to hit each other with slide rules
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10I could count on my wife for understanding. At the meet with P. my cell rang. It was her:"So, Baby, a mermaid?" The tinkle of smashing glass. The sound of my pet's labored breaths.
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7Unfortunately, the protrusion wasn't lost on Minnie:"Look who's been in a closet all these years!" "Wait, Minnie, there's nothing between Pluto & me!" "Is that a fire hose in your
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3ar bill, ignoring the residual aroma of a 1-roll pooping session. Hilda was a notorious skinflint, & the sight of the burning cash sent her into cardiac arrest. She was rushed to
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7"Intervention!" we all exclaimed. Mother then lifted her creation:"This is your brain." She dropped it in the sizzling pan:"This is your brain on drugs." Father wept & began rehab.
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5encouragingly at the troops. Two musicians materialized out of the battle fog singing "I'm all out of love.." "I said air SUPPORT!" Kenny screamed into his cuff. "Oops. Now sending
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5An hour later I was well enough to attend my company's Man of the Year award…that I won! Standing on the stage, there was shrill barking & a flurry of activity from my crotch area.
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2raged inside his bald dome. As he grinned inanely & intoned:"Top of the morning!" he craved for a nuclear football to set off. And that is why they aren't issued to postal workers.
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3Look, I'm seated on the throne already. Can't we do this interview AFTER my dump? Why are reporters crowding in here? The monster is coming? Well, <plop>, news flash: one just did!
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3, & the audience applauded. Camilla beamed, but next morn the cinematic press was full of the lead roll's "breathlessly convincing death act". "Argh!" ranted Camilla:"She WAS dead!
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5vril Lavigne, mightn't it tarnish my manly image in her eyes? I remonstrated: "I'm the CHIEF doll tester of this toy company, dammit! If I can't be Putin, what are we coming to?!"
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4And then a hideous sound turned my knees to jelly: the pouring of oatmeal into a bowl. "NO NO NO NO!" I screamed, resuming my struggle. "I WON'T eat that! Go away, all of you..glug
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4me who offed your dad. Also, Lassie dies at the end of the movie we were watching. AND I'm really a dude." I saw red: "A SPOILER, Barbie?! Are you even human?!" I chased her (him?)
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4the Goodyear Blimp, & did a commercial for Col. Sanders with the slogan:"It's a no-brainer!" having overlooked the clause about epitomizing the ad.It winded up licked off a finger.
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3their poop meticulously in search of treasure. To her disappointment, none of the patients had swallowed a gold doubloon that day. Nurse considered human-trafficking them, if only
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1decent," suggested Agent McCoy. Agent Davis froze, & then promptly heaved the battering ram thru the door: "IRS! Emergency audit! Stay exactly as is!" He eagerly ran to her bedroom
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3" Jimmie & Jane gaped wide-eyed at their nude grandpa & dialed the pedo/zombie toll free hotline. Ash arrived, chainsaw revved, and pruned grandpa's toupee. "Ew!" shouted everyone.
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2was devastated for me: "Thanks so much for taking the rap! The mere thought of you pining away in some galactic dungeon…is HOT! I'm filing for conjugal visitation rights." REALLY!?