Finished Folds (61—80)
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8The eggs hatched and out of each popped about a dozen little Sqauwkopteryxs dressed as tiny clowns. Huh, so I guess clowns are higher on the evolutionary chain.
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2So I am thinking of suing the Skittles candy company. Turns out that a rainbow tastes NOTHING like their nasty bag of sugary treats. I figured this out over the past weekend
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4"No, for real! I swear hush puppies are made out of REAL puppies." Wow. My butcher had never steered me wrong in the past, so I had to believe him. Still, made me wonder if
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3The ghost of Ben Franklin appeared above my bed last night. He merely stared at me and pointed his long boney finger at me. In the morning I found a note upon which was written
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5Cincinnati?! Cincinnati?! What the hell is there to do in Cincinnati? Frank shook his head at Betty in amazement that she so yearned to vacation in such an oddly named city.
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2immediately hopped on stage before learning it was Broadway showtunes night, not open mic night. The queens ripped him apart in anger, and ended up saving the world from his evil.
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5package behind the dumpster where Spanky the delivery-guy tossed it. Squawkers could not wait to open it and try the Japanese eye-brighteners on himself, but upon putting them
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4but unlike the 80s when his balls had not dropped, he now was ready to put them to use, and the ripped leotard allowed his junk to be easily accessed for everyone to use it to
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4Lagnappe's advice should have been followed. Turns out that Fiorella and Randolph J. 'Hurricane' Spencer were siblings, and they both now had the clap compliments of Lagnappe.
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2on the "pet me" button on the site ... only to realize it was a Furry Fan site. OMG! I never realized how sexually exciting mascots could be. Forget my cats, my new interest was
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6go outside and see if my kidnapped slave laborer is done cutting the grass. I usually threaten to throw crickets on her if she doesn't move fast enough or is she fiddles with my
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6see if the lottery is really rigged. So, as a ghost I snuck into the lottery room and, yeah, I played with the lotto balls. hehe. Anyway, then it came to have the numbers drawn
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3like to the disco!! I'm not gay or anything!! I mean, let's go bonk some baby seals on the head and make coats out of them. And we can start with the cute one right here.
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11But, like so many marriages, it also had an expiration date. Thus, on my wedding night, I dove right in and went to town eating my new spouse, the box of PB Crunch. Yum!!
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3dripped down his chest, down his leg, and puddled under him. A salesman came running over and kicked Squawkers and screamed "can't you damn birds control when you potty?!" Poor
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8Then again, Abe Lincoln has a quasi-beard and was apparently trustworthy. But that damn stove-top hat he wore made me question some of his fashion choices, so could I trust him?
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16shopping in the nude while singing Barry Manilow's greatest hits. 8) Ask a nun if she wants to experience Heaven on Earth. 9) Wear a thong for a day. 10) crank call a
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5wing up, most everyone only saw rare and unverified sightings of his brother Sasquawkers. These sights were so rare, that Squawkers could not recall the last time that he actually
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4nifed the doctor in the back. Yes, a little Shakespearian and drastic, but Madam Wong wanted her wart removed, not her pet warthog killed. Madam Wong picked up the knife and
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3devote the remaining days of his life to preserve sugar gliders for centuries to come. This of course gave sugar gliders an unfair evolutionary advantage that allowed them to