LordVacuity's photo
 

The truth is that I emerged. I escaped the confines of my mothership. I killed my mothership that day. I would come to feel sorrow about that soon enough. For the moment though, I

LordVacuity's photo
 

You no doubt have heard that it isn't easy being cheesy. I am living proof of that doozy. I was born. I am forced to say born because those were the facts as they made their way on

LordVacuity's photo
 

Tartufffes locked in the locks of the canals on the red planet. Not to be outdone, the electric sheep pirouetted on point and together slip a hustle under the eviscerated cat holes

LordVacuity's photo
 

They hopped to it. Trying to be helpful. They were loading vats of ectoplasm on the skid when Dork #1 started having 2nd thoughts about covering her in this ectoplasm. Unchaste was

LordVacuity's photo
 

One year, for a lark, the head of John The Baptist and I both gave up wine for Lent. We don't know who we lent it to but we had to make do by drinking mead. The head of JtB, kept

Jimbeau's photo
 

Septic Engineering and Klepto Maniology. I went to school with Peter Van Testicle and his twin sister, Vadge. I did not, however, know that they ate weasels, or that they’re Dutch.

LordVacuity's photo
 

“Do you know why I pulled you over?” “No Officer, I don’t. I know is isn’t because I have the missing girl’s body in my truck.” “What? Sir do you have a body in your trunk?” “Not

SlimWhitman's photo
 

all the talking, except I'm not talking,it's the voice in your head that's doing the talking. Why do I hear voices in my head, you ask yourself, in Slim's voice but 5th fold passed

LordVacuity's photo
 

Burt Ms. Lynn didn't leave a milky residue. She just left an ash that the wind quickly did short service on. How did you do that? I can't believe you've just incinerated my cat.

Jimbeau's photo
 

cattle prod, and then she told him she loved him because that’s what teacher’s do to catboys. Raiden was awfully liberated, and he didn’t take “no” for an answer. So, she beat him.