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A tangerine that begs you to eat it. To dig into its flesh with your teeth until the juices come flowing out, leaving your hands sticky and your heart content. Though, if you were
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A light rain was falling when I walked out of the building. Dusk was at hand and a steak somewhere was calling my name. Dutch Fairlane. Dutch on account I was Dutch. Nobody knew my
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"I once ate my baby. When I was homeless and living in the husk of a car in Alaska," she said blankly. "That's my darkest story. Now you tell me yours." "That's not what I meant."
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ed him from breathing. "I'll have this lump out of your throat in no time, and you'll be fine," Dr. Goodfeel assured him, but made a point to requisition an extra body bag just in
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was dismayed to find an admissions COMMITTEE there, but quickly recovered:"Have you no shame," she thundered "fully dressed on national fur protest day?!" The assembled dignitaries
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ed its trajectory just beside her, and I held my hand out the window for her to grab before she was enveloped in the mud. But to my surprise, she leapt directly into my chimney and
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was better than Pollock. His Picasso was better than Picasso. This orangutan was destined to eclipse humanity in his art-making. But this would only work if he was ever recognized
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She prayed that Martin specifically, who was weak for a good beach, would volunteer himself to go first and become the cautionary casualty. She knew he was gunning for Ship Lead
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a frightening recruitment strategy that opened employment to all species that could complete an interview. The interview program was modified to accept responses from amoebas, frog
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where he tentatively opened the freezer. John had excreted an insulating substance all over his skin so that he wouldn't die from the cold. Impressive. Maybe he could leave him in
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heads. Regrettably, the four children were told, they would now be inseparable. Like conjoined twins, the filthy kids were bound by their mutually-tangled hair.
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The moniker was earned when Old Bobby down the hill ate a few and promptly contracted a prion disease. In truth he'd eaten the mushrooms alongside some questionable roadkill.
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Naturally, then, the children began to ask embarrassing yes or no questions. "Is your penis small?" YES. "Am I your favorite person ever?" YES. "Does Debra smell bad?" YES.
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Mr. Padma loves to smell my farts. I dont know why though. Sometimes when I want to scare people I just let one rip. Its usually not a fart... But a shart.... I LOVE SHARTING!!!!!!
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The girl walked up to her girlfriend Infront of everyone kissing her on the lips. The rebellious girl picked her girlfriend up and walked her to the twos dorm laying down cuddeling
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5 second rule. He picked it up. It liverwurst and stilton on pumpernickel . He threw it back on the floor. "You deserve each other," he told the floor and the sandwich. The office
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Fold STory
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Rosebud screamed in return, "Kablooey!" And the immature 12-year-old screaming match was on. Who would win? Rosebud or Kablooey? I'll tell you one thing, folks:
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Having done that, Captain Picard returned to his chair. "Ahead, Warp Factor 3." Data fumbled the controls in a rare moment of clumsiness, and the ship suddenly warped in reverse.
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spontaneously combusted, scorched whiskers and singed fur flying everywhere. One might think this was a serious overreaction on the part of those cats, but in fact it was just a