nor children or the poor. Equality wasn't even defined as equitable. The founders of this nation had no clue what we would evolve into nor how their precedents would get in the way

to a far off land. A land never heard of before. A place where mammals slide along their backs with their feet up in the air and fish swim through the air. The bird dropped me in

e upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary... this story beginnings on the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring,

L.A. had become home to a race of Zombie Pornographers who lived up in the hills, at the top of Sunset Park Place, with a view, on a clear day, that stretched from Mid Wilshire to

Stuart Little shook his head. ''They aren't. But I don't think you're being optimistic about this. You could get a lot of experience. Now, come with me. These demons are going to w

“Nope, we’re just trying to escape the floodwaters..” the cane toads said with a sheepish grin. It was all going well until a human decided to film the snake and it’s gang of toads

of watching compilations of people falling. The robots descended in uniform fashion, blaring 80s tunes and dressed in its fashion. "We have come to st-eal your groo-ve~" they sang

before the tomatoes shoot me, don't care if they're fruits, they'll be vegetables when I get done with 'em. Again, I'm the MC Ginsu Junner, flowing flow like an obsolete punner,

I once imagined a masher in a dark 1920's decor auditorium cum cinema porno palace called the Pornorama Extravaganza. I imagined him exploding along with everything but the papaya.

The genderless cat had decided long ago to never be parted from it’s pea sized brain, its only possession. It had traded eight lives for it. She was quite proud of it. Then that ha

d be happier than shit that--without any discernible skills--you have a job good enough to afford you a roach-infested single trailer on the Banana River, and food stamps to buy

Oohlong Fiddlestein was originally an hour and a third early to his interview. A friend told him that was much too early. So Oohlong decided to wait at the Buckstars Sarsaparilla

This is an ordinary story about an ordinary day and the very ordinary man who made the ordinary special.

I pegged the Italian tutor for a pederast but otherwise clean. Acceptable as collateral damage.

Poisoned our water supply. The tables had turned the wrong way and we were now under siege but some Duke or Count. Somebody rich enough to have 4 trebuchets at his beck and call.

But then she came to her senses--slapped herself in the face ten times--she was a socialite; she had money & power--screw the fallen; they can't use jewelry. Off came the gas mask.

Ellen walked out to Gary as the audience booed. She hoped he'd kiss her, but Gary thought she was going to shove her off the stage. He pushed her aside with his Saxophone and she

hand before I do someone a nuisance. Everyone wants to be magical, but few of us have the presence of mind to control ourselves with it, and so it must be restricted to those who

Their love of hot girls, and creating song lyrics, made JT Wolf and Vincent Wop fast friends. They teamed up with pianist, Del Wags and drummer, Willard Zeke to form Thurlow Weed.

That scar, in fact, had once been her mouth, but when she landed on Earth she had to have it sewn up because it freaked people out and made her mission far more difficult. Salons