When they dug the radio out of the swamp, all of a sudden it didn't want to work no more. Big Bob and Lil Robert decided they were gonna have to see about that. They & some others

casting aspersions about Paddy and Jesus' relationship. "Were they friends of Dorothy," Dougy was heard asking loudly in the Goofball Ballroom Rumba Room. Jesus was drunk on water.

Hell or high water, I would have my revenge. I looked at down at the survivors, most of them strangers. These were now my people. They would be my weapon. I needed to hone them.

"Yeah you are," said the panda in a lecherous voice putting the mint tin back in his fob pocket. I gave him the fuzzy eye and dice and he gave me a good look of his package. A deal

Nobody is sure who the few people that know this fact are. Some people don't know the actual fact, only that it is little known. Neither the chickens or the lesbians wanted to go

The cat snapped, yelled "AccCK" & attacked Bill. Bill somehow never imagined the cat attacking so he was caught completely by surprise & was easily dispatched by the cat. His body

from his torso in several quick, precise strokes. From experience I knew that even the brave would probably flinch, but my lookahead sense let me axe-shave even his nipples without

He used to have 6 magic beans, but last Thursday he'd gotten a little peckish. Today, he was going to plant the other magic beans in the dirt beneath his immobile van and see what

It has been noticed quite regularly that in Luton everybody's mother is a munter or a bremelo. Being both seemed to be all they aspired to be. One such was our hero's mum, Olivia.

bodice ripping yarns later and there was a call for more brass and leather accouterments be added to the game. Phineas argued that the cost was nearing the tipping point & beyond

barely heard from a passing car made me even angrier. It was the Eagles "Hotel California". I didn't get angry on my account but on Jeff Lebowski's. It was his house, after all.

the gravy on. They think they've arrived at a hospital, but little do they know that this is my kitchen! Mwahaha!" Dr. Mash bellowed. This was the most violent kids show Katie had

by children ended in them getting more candy, only time-outs. Wait no, that wasn't it. But actually, I think it's better. Director! Can I change my line? No? How about

"Beer Barrel Polka" on the bassoon, again. Our lips are too dry to even play a home-made kazoo. But Saint Peter doesn't mind. In fact, he's relieved. There's far too much music in

She lacks fashion sense, though. I want to help but I don't want to fall under the rusalka's spell. Plus, all of my exes tried to make me into someone I was not, so I didn't want

Just tonight...only a few moments ago...the aliens released the Chester County White breed domesticated pig called Arnold Ziffel X and a politician calling himself Mike Pece.

The gardener to the man who coined the phrase: "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" has tied the knot with Chas Bono's hairstylist.

Stupid plus uneducated equals money...power...fame...in the Age of Mediocrity...self-obsession, narcissism, overachievement...those are the skills of the future workforce.

my dad eating my mom in the utility room. She was still trying to beat him off but she had lost so much blood she was dying. When I grabbed dad’s arm to pull him away the arm came

Something is sluggishly trying to defend itself. Identity has been jettisoned at this point. Existence is the prize that wants keeping. Identity can be rebuilt or not, but none of