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Nincompoops, Ne’er- do-wells, and Nags! Let’s go get some Death Eater partyyyyyyyyyyyyy-
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nearest purple dinosaur. Barney shrugged, going back to making a stew containing beans, bacon bits, spices, and boiling pieces of girlfriends.
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, but Tomasco the cat held a remote that controlled a nuclear warhead. So Francisco and the cavemen mice people were in a bit of a pickle. Without any vinegar. Cucumber
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favor and go play a balancing act of Jenga with someone else’s potatoes. we’re closing!”
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had to do with rock and roll. I get that boulders and rocks are similar in appearance, but I didn’t think it was quite so literal. Maybe I should listen to country music instead
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wanted to be a cow. They’re fat, ugly, and do nothing but complain about something with grass in their stomachs. But then again, free milk and cheese isn’t so bad.
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Grandma hunter. You see, this Wolf was addicted to Grandma’s cookies she made with Red. So it would be quite hard for him to kill the ones who made him cookies without a good sou
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bone, which isn’t as uncomfortable as it looks. You see, clavicles and hipbones happened to be best buddies. And they got along so well, they decided to be neighbors.
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What the witless man had yelled at me nagged at me all day. Even as I went home a different way to avoid him, his words were like an earworm digging it's way further into my mind.
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Three minutes into this morning’s staff meeting, I was already imagining the thousands of ways I could gut the new VP of Dense Crunch, Philip Aloud Ittuhappen. He seemed to think
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I should have know he was a whacko when I saw his business card that ID’d him as Doktor-Professor Urdesh Whakko, Freelance Psychiatrist. There were a bunch of acronyms & organizati
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He was one of those dorks that pretended to read Dostoevsky in the original Russian when he was in sixth grade. He walked to his classes toting a Large Print Russian Edition of The
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What do we know about Reason? We didn't even know we existed until 18 words and a number ago. As far as we knew, they called him Reason because Reason was his name. What other reas
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We saw the shadows sneaking up on us. Well, I thought they were sneaking up but Louie says that they were just really slow but it was obvious what they were doing. They weren't try
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I knew there was a paradise that I was forgetting. Had it been blown out the open windows by the desert night? Everything just fell apart once we knew that truth wasn't truth. Voti
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I lent my lips to the Organ of the State to celebrate their tricentennial. They wore them before them like shields of easily punctured flesh. I knew there would be chafing but when
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felt a gentle scraping as the man-eating plant pulled the flesh from my face with its serrated teeth. Under the effects of the poison, it felt like I was being exfoliated at a spa.
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It's as beautiful as it is confusing. Any event in the course of human history could be remembered and retold in millions of different ways. Deciding which tale is closest to the
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But one person's minor loss can become someone else's wonderful moment. Kim picked up the abandoned paperback copy of '1984' she found on the route 773 bus. By the time her stop
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get your own damn fruit," too occupied with painting his nails to look up at her. She inhaled deeply and drew herself up. "That shade of burgundy does NOT match your skin tone!"