Olmstead was currently reading Alice Bailey's book on the rituals of initiation. He underlined in green ink and realised why only Book Book store stocked her numerous volumes.

like anchovy caviar on salt pork...or is it saltpeter?" Of course he knew if there was even a trace of saltpeter inside a booger shot out of his arse that it was Guinness Nitro IPA

a parkinson's patient with his legs blown off at the knees." I sobbed even more. "Father that is horrible and a mean thing to say to your own son." Alocadas laughed. "Your my secon

It is a fact, as factual as a fact can be factual; I'm neither a politician nor a journalist. It is a fact that twigs and berries and strawberry creams are always in my dreams!

Beth was born blind. When the doctors removed the bandages all that she had fealt before with her fingers, nose and ears was visible. It was ugly! The world was ugly and disgusting

set in motion. Wiggling worm people related to leeches danced about singing in high pitch voices only dogs could hear, tunes that sound like whistle while you work. It was all terr

they all piss their pants. It's funny! It's also true." These rednecks eyed Lawrence up and down, tanking him for a city slicker. Little did they know he was once a survival expert

have discovered the fountain of youth and bathed in the glittering gold dust from El Dorado. It happening I tell you. "Here sir take your pill... no no the blue one, not the red!"

crowd would cheer appreciatively at Squiggles' good-humored antics, with the beheaded bodies making a special effort to join in the clapping. For his next waggish act, he poked out

running for President. "Madam," reporters would ask "is it true you support free trade?" That's where Glenda's adroitness came into play: "Yes- but only within certain parameters!"

of all things. Was it possible A17 found them to be more interesting than she did Eric? Then he remembered the time he had insisted they while away the night chanting prime numbers

vibrations and undulating good-moves brought forth a torrent of gushing clear liquid that swirled around and around Uranus. Venus was jealous, Saturns rings kept it

Jo Jo wasn't too sure The kitchen was nice and he knew that an armistice was coming but, there was the neighbor. She was super nosy. She already had her nose pressed to the window.

I was any passenger! I jumped up from my seat and using my unscrupulously gotten talent of lock picking I opened the door. I grabbed the only parachute. "See ya later suckers!" I

particularly hot day, Dab's boss came in to hassle him over the split of one set of two ply. Just as he was shouting up a storm he spontaneously combusted! The toilet paper caught

. It'd've been inappropriate to date a friend of my aunt, so I did the gentlemanly thing & settled into Marsha's spacious clothes closet to peep on her. But after 6 months of this,

rs on everyone and shave my hair off so I can squeeze out of this fold. After all my luscious blonde curly locks are down to my assets and as thick as three bibles on my head.

too. In fact, with the horniness of everyone in the Target store peaking, it became a scary place to shop. Patrons picketted out front for the right to shop without being molested

. "They are only worth 35 cents!" he complained. "No exceptions," the dealer at MGM Grand explained. "Cash out or explode." Now with 35 cents in his pocket Fred saunter off to

zzy drunk in a hard hat and half molded skort. Smiled at him, "You the escort I hired on getacheapdate.com?" My dad's a billionaire and I hate these schmoozy parties." I had a job.