I told myself that This Time I would not go all self referential just because I had stolen time to spare for the impossible. That is what I told myself but I didn't listen & here w

He knew, somehow, that he was making it harder for who ever it was that would follow but he was not clever enough to shirk his duty to the story. So he pretended to be clever.

I pretended that there was an answer. That this presence that we both denied existed between us would play that part for us so that we could keep both pretending & point, in relief

He thought I was joking when I told him I was Eric Samosa. "What kind of joke is it being Eric Samosa", I asked some stranger on the street that didn't know I was Eric Samosa.

But I'm going to cheat. Playing around with the prophecy to my financial benefit is the biggest perk of my position as the State Arbitrator of The Real. I could afford a new car ev

While he fell on the ground, the bag dropped beside him. The paladin heard a baby crying. "Whose baby is that?" he said, while he stood with his foot on the neck of the wizard

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Usually in this show we talk about things like the zombie apocalypse. But this time we have a guest that already saw zombies." The host pointed

A 'frikandel' happened to be a Dutch snack with minced raw onions. The wizard thought it was disgusting and he gave it to an orc. "Here taste this. What do you think?" But the orc

"For sale: baby shoes, never worn." Now that was an interesting ad in the newspaper. Bob dialed the phone number below the ad. "Hello? My name is Bob McBobson. I was reading the

tus. The gem on her forehead started glowing. She levitated above her hospital bed. "I .... am .... Kalki!!!! I .... am .... an .... AVATAR!!!!" The nurses screamed and escaped the

So you better take this," said Audrey. She handed her granddaughter a can of pepper spray. "It's for your own good, Linda! There are many jerks and most of them are men!" Linda was

ignored Mr. Sprocket's order. "Come on, Mr. Bit. Do you meet me at the anomaly's coordinates?" Bit said nothing and stared at Mr. Sprocket's intergalactic mountain bike. The planet

"Hello? That phone you are holding now is my phone!" said Joe. "Si? Excuse me, I speak not very great well English," Joaquin responded. "You have stolen my phone!!!" Joe was

is like a black hole. My brother is a bottomless pit when it comes to food. Everything deepfried, everything containing tons of sugar ... even this night everything would end up in

without any victims. Someone must have put that drugs in Jordan's suitcase on his trip to Thailand. The Bangkok police noticed and killed him on the spot. My son's casket was

People say you should not regret everything in your life, but they are wrong. You are allowed to regret as much as possible. But use that regret to change your life. Life is like

for some reason. "Well, can you believe it" I said out loud. "Just when I decide to stop my career as a writer, I see a seal tied to a rocket!" I left my room to search a pen and a

knew jazz musicians have this secret society of scat readers. "Or Miles Davis? Miles can analyze the poop of this beast in no time." The scoutmaster responded: "Little Rodney,

"I don't know," Sarah said. "A story about cats who are forced to march towards their death sounds kinda depressing. And won't George Lucas sue us when we use 'lightsabres' in this

The evil norn toyed with his fate like a spoiled child rolls a toy train into a wall. Over, and over, and over again, with a look of demented glee on his face, drool glazing his li