The funnies of me watching reflect badly upon me. They must stop. Before the midnight begins. Then the witching hour might leave you twitching without ammunition & in serious condi

I try to be fair but the voices won't let me. They tell me that all of you out there are dangerous and that I should never go out but he doesn't know that I go out all the time.

With a gusto that he never imagined he had, he listed the cattle by name. All 3432 of them, by name. Cowslip Connie from Croatia, Two Spots over port ear and her daughter, Clover.

B&W footage of college student in Paris in the 1950s. Wearing a beret wrong. Known for that beret. Identified by that beret for domestic violence against a fortnight and a pudding.

aculately coiffed. Huron Ze called for our top celeb squad. It had never occurred to any of them that one day they would be working along side Huron Fucking Ze! Adept in a lab &

he & Govinda had rode their ox, Gretchen, through the yam fields calling themselves Maharashiis of this & that. Bhoti Hohti was always trailing behind them because of her breasts.

evices having been ruled not to be sexual paraphernalia, he still bad about giving one to his baby sister to take to her prom. So being called bareskin didn't even register with hi

Sing Sing and Det. Manatee was going in undercover of night. The chains were for backup. They each had a school of Sea Monkeys hidden inside a hollowed out void. The bad judge pass

Det. Manatee & the Sea Monkeys were in the studio recording a new song for their agency's youth programs. It was supposed to be about how being a detective was Super-Coolericious.

He threatened that it was 10:53 PM even though it was. I didn't know. I wasn't watching the clock all the time. I had better things to do. Like scoring mamacitas for Det. Manatee's

A darker dark greeted me today, Day 328 Since. It whispered about secret meetings about the Dust Up: in secret places and secret times. With secret people, entities. Not all human.

Excuse my transgressions, my yard stick is skewed by the lip your face is giving. I don't like no uppity git. Yes, you have to apologize for everything you are going to make me do

Plus, I was trying to keep quiet to avoid attracting the attention of any ravagers in the wasteland. Some time passed, and I chanced a response. "Yeah, I'm good. You?" The silence

mouth out with soap from all the swearing I'll be doing as I frantically scratch my epidermis off. So move over, Rover, I'm getting in this flea-dip before I shred myself. Ahhhh...

were drinking. All in all, not bad for Hell, at the time. The next morning, however, I awoke with the devil playing a sousaphone in my head and some tattooed Buddha's arm across my

A word too far. If I had not said it... but I did say it. 1 word changed it all. & it didn't. But it did & you, my reader, are the proof of it. Do not think you are reading this by

Of them all, I think my favorite succubus was Telidtha. She had started out as an Oblate of Ba'al in the backwoods of the 7th Circle of the 7th Hell in the 7th Aeon. She never seem

ed with a self replicating erector soldier he'd let loose in the toy department to build a miniature army he waddled into the control room in his Barney costume.The unattended safe

a heart shaped key and two nickles with letters engraved in them that matched the letters on the eyes of the rare robot. Since I could not open the panel right away I looked for lu

self preservation through the pickling of the body. Mankind cannot be cryogenically preserved without true blue horse glue. So in a mad rush to preserve themselves, all the hobnobs