Literally everyone I've asked agrees you're not supposed to see ninjas. I am worried shitless because I saw one. He was crossing the street all ninja. But it was broad daylight. Am

The video ended. The room remained quiet. Then Mitchell Brothers piped up. "Why did I look so disheveled in that last scene?" Miss Shipton pointed out, "You looked impeccable to me

The Bee King donned his apparatus. It made him look like a bug eyed monster. He liked that. He pressed a button on his belt and took a heroic pose. When nothing happened he pushed

He handed me a flower of creation, and bade me poke it in my pipe. I took a little toke and said, "Yeah, Dad, that's all right. But what if I were to tell you that I am actually

I used to fantasize about being Walter Mitty imagining all the fun things he could do. I'd be Walter Mitty pretending to be MacArthur returning to the Philippines with a corn cobb

How many times did a shiny new 2nd lieutenant promise to be back up that hill and die trying? Their determination had no impact on the bullet that found them. That bullet impacted

"I Spake with a clear Voice and nothing happened. Only after I took to the booze and smokes could I really say Behold." God was having a Total Eclipse of the Heart, but how could I

Airos, you must set your weapons of chalangra and murtos aside, and your body as well, for I have a great purpose for you. "But Dad, my abs and pecs are at peak beauty! How could

I ended up on the outside looking in at myself looking out. I don’t know which of me was more embarrassed. Still, I powered through and learned something about myself. I was not in

Writing about my fingers covered in warm yolk made me not do the thing I was writing about doing. By then the yolks were cold and unappealing. They would never make the cover. A sp

One time, I think I was maybe 5, I kept annoying my mom who was breastfeeding my little sister. She tried to swat me away. She misjudged it and punched me hard. I lost my breath.

Samsa G. left the QuikMart & went around the corner to beat himself up for buying more than one lottery ticket. "You should've had more faith in your 1st ticket asshole." Bystander

Fyodor began to see how the lottery & a swearing in were the same lame game. Llamas knew it as well. An alpaca with maracas wrapped in Alaskan damask asked an aging apparatchik at

The drone video showed our drone killers engaging the terrain drones. “That’ll alert them we’re ready to meet them on the battlefield.” “Colonel, they’ve started picking ours off.”

The Long Tall woman had it all and I meant to take from her. I made my move by hitting her left hand woman, Shartrise with a paternity suit. I saw right away I’d stepped wrongly. A

Our entanglements are what always gets us. Our loved ones. Our people. We're prepared to take the heat but they aren't or shouldn't have to be. When they do, we're often undone.

Do you know the reason why you never see parliamentarians in trouble? It is because parliamentarians follow the process. It hardly needs stipulating. Ted has a lot of explaining to

Ancestral ferric tumbleweed Zhik Chavra tried to adapt Prince's "Purple Rain" for a wide spectrum of Martian sensibilities, but

Listening to Mædieval Babes singing Scarsbury Fair when I’m struck by question, “How True was the love if the other lives and there is a were involved.?”

Er was eens een man die over zijn eigen telefoon reed