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  • 10
    Avatar
    One day, Steve was going about his "normal" day as a secret agent. However, today ended up being much more than he would have ever expected when
    Finished
    2012-05-08 18:41:22
    Took
    271 days, 45 minutes, 47 seconds
  • 27
    Avatar
    turned off onto into a gas station hoping to locate a hose to cleanse my soiled shoe, or gun with which to shoot myself. I fantasized walking into the mini-mart that almost all
    Finished
    2012-05-08 19:24:58
    Took
    1 year, 96 days, 11 hours, 52 minutes, 43 seconds
  • 58
    Avatar
    The Chairman upstairs is watching. You don't really have a free will. If you try to deviate from "the plan," he will cause your coffee to spill, thereby missing the bus, causing
    Finished
    2012-05-08 19:27:08
    Took
    291 days, 2 hours, 37 minutes, 6 seconds
  • 19
    Avatar
    The amazonian woman bowed and sat down at the piano. Her hands moved delicately across the keyboard hovering like two swans. He heard no sound but the movements mesmerized him
    Finished
    2012-05-09 03:36:02
    Took
    343 days, 4 hours, 13 minutes, 46 seconds
  • 26
    Avatar
    Once upon a time, a teacher....
    Finished
    2012-05-09 04:01:34
    Took
    321 days, 20 hours, 59 minutes, 47 seconds
  • 29
    Avatar
    "My wife ran off with my best friend... and boy do I miss him." The audience groaned. He was gonna have to do better than that.
    Finished
    2012-05-09 04:05:38
    Took
    318 days, 11 hours, 56 minutes, 48 seconds
  • 12
    Avatar
    There was a girl who loved to go shopping. Everyday when she got home from school she would get her purse and go to the mall. She never wore the same outfit. Her only problem was
    Finished
    2012-05-09 07:13:10
    Took
    271 days, 15 hours, 14 minutes, 57 seconds
  • 26
    Avatar
    "My computer is giving a false positive," she typed, "indicating that my secondary hard drive is facing imminent failure. Tests and observation show this is untrue. What do I do?"
    Finished
    2012-05-09 07:18:15
    Took
    201 days, 11 hours, 19 minutes, 26 seconds
  • 24
    Avatar
    It decesion time and my brain is turning into a big mush, with steam comming out of my ears so I,
    Finished
    2012-05-09 19:11:43
    Took
    271 days, 3 hours, 55 minutes, 23 seconds
  • 25
    Avatar
    This was not going to be my best day. I knew this the moment I stepped out of bed and fell over my shoes I had carelessly scattered around my bed the evening before. My head felt
    Finished
    2012-05-09 19:12:53
    Took
    132 days, 16 hours, 58 minutes, 33 seconds
  • 12
    Avatar
    It was the second to the last day for the National Writing Project fellows. After a gratifying four weeks of writing boot camp, they were about to be free. Then things got weird.
    Finished
    2012-05-09 19:14:57
    Took
    285 days, 22 hours, 6 minutes, 22 seconds
  • 14
    Avatar
    Awakened after æons, Zalgo, emerging from the unfathomable depths of the most inaccessible icebergs of the southernmost regions of mars, glanced pensively towards Earth
    Finished
    2012-05-09 19:17:57
    Took
    1 year, 8 days, 14 hours, 44 minutes, 1 second
  • 23
    Avatar
    "No, you can't", replied Papa Smurf angrily to the question "Is it ok if I
    Finished
    2012-05-10 03:37:07
    Took
    1 year, 2 days, 11 hours, 28 seconds
  • 10
    Avatar
    twas the night before Christmas? no no just kidding twas the night before valentines day
    Finished
    2012-05-10 04:13:19
    Took
    185 days, 2 hours, 15 minutes, 25 seconds
  • 18
    Avatar
    My life as an on-call phone-answerer for rickets telethons wasn't all glitz and glamour.
    Finished
    2012-05-10 11:20:14
    Took
    322 days, 18 hours, 13 minutes, 50 seconds
  • 9
    Avatar
    Humphrey was a man of action, and as a man of action the first thing he did every morning was hunt and eat 3 feral wolves and drink a bucket of magma. After this his routine was to
    Finished
    2012-05-10 11:23:21
    Took
    1 year, 9 days, 4 hours, 21 minutes, 26 seconds
  • 30
    Avatar
    (excrpted from nutmegaman) "Hee hee." "Are we done giggling?" asked Sister Christian, "Because you all make me sick
    Finished
    2012-05-10 11:33:14
    Took
    235 days, 8 hours, 57 minutes, 8 seconds
  • 34
    Avatar
    My son finished raking leaves into a big pile & then abandoned it, explaining the bogey man under there swallowed his football. I smiled inside but the next day my car was missing
    Finished
    2012-05-10 11:40:06
    Took
    191 days, 19 hours, 24 minutes, 37 seconds
  • 36
    Avatar
    "Good morning, and welcome to GlOBE Otters, the world's first and only astral travel agency for otterkind. How may I help you?"
    Finished
    2012-05-10 15:38:59
    Took
    298 days, 21 hours, 51 minutes, 7 seconds
  • 9
    Avatar
    Dora the Explorer was really an Asian Boy. It was the only acting gig he could get. He tried his best to keep up the lie but
    Finished
    2012-05-11 03:28:10
    Took
    199 days, 11 hours, 5 minutes, 23 seconds
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