just thought Tony was Grrrreat! And that was actually enough in these later days of personality-free flotsam & jetsam. Tony preached that Frosted Mana would fall from heaven and

so hard that it spit up all over Zerg. The milky Zerg bait attracted Janda almost immediately & she circled the bait ominously. Baby was fist-pumping & gurgling by now while I shot

. By listening to my Klingon travel phrase CD, I hoped to qualify for a spot on the Enterprise as space tourist: "ishgh kkkllljhhhhh kirkfddddsxzzzkhreekukon- Kirk is a douchebag"

Less than a candle later and the 2 year old Mage Princess was now undisputed Empress of all the Magical Kingdoms of Old Earth. She still wasn't potty trained but she was in charge.

Today is the day I finally learned that humans are not God's first foray into In His Image marketing. The Jinn were here before we were. Granting us wishes is their way of getting

confused when he noticed I'd seen him. The Dove of Peace shook it's head in a bird's double take. His pupils blew up in surprise and detonated on my porch. I have bits of the it in

"I am a topiary," the Man With No Irises replied, hopping forward in his pot. "I need your help, Lorenza. My plants with sword shaped leaves and showy flowers, my irises, have

, bubbles, everywhere bubbles! Irish bubbles! "Aye & ye be smellin' a wee bit sweeter, after all!" teased a bonny lass named, um, Bonnie. "Yer have shamrocks growing outta yer

I’ve ordered the fortifications to be refortified to the recommendations of Senor Da Vince. Don Leonardo is building a weapon wagon that the sappers are slathering for. My sister M

, my hat and cloak transformed into a mighty circus tent, and I used my cane to grab a corner flap. Through her meaty fingers and Iron Chef-grip I managed to call for help. Bozo

My phobias are sharing the island with me. They get along with each other pretty much as well as they get along with me, which they don’t. My agoraphobia already killed my claustro

incarnated politicians. Trump denied it:"We made no deal to have our hell sentences commuted to winter wonderland packages with fur coat thrown in. Fake news." & swallowed a salmon

broken, its fragments strewn on the floor. I kept hemming and hawing, hoping everyone would forget. But they knew. The crowd began to close ranks and huddle over the carnage.

Every mudra had to be right. The future of several universes depended on his getting each mudra right. The mudra for believing unbelief was being stubborn but he finally got it in.

made sense anymore. Batman knew somebody knew what happened to his verbal skills when Spider-Man was around. There had been whispering already about Dick. He didn’t need this compl

I raised his broken body above my head so the cameras could see and have no doubt what that stupid man made me do to him over a parking spot. I told him he was welcome to the spot.

In the cities the things that might kill you know limits but the jungle doesn’t knows only one limit, hunger. Things have to strike fast to escape that limit. If you’re not hungry,

But what else has a sock got to look forward too? The future? A future of constantly getting soaked & loosing your partner in the dryer. The day is gone & now I’ve the night to get

In the dim light they were mistaken for Donald Trump & Kim Jong Un and drowned by the regulars in a butt of Malmsey. This is the origin of the gourmet 'Holy Iguanan Aquavit', drun

DJT gave the delivery man a big tip, "Get a real job...slacker!" Then he plopped down on the inflatable mattress with his bucket of extra crispy chicken and turned on CNN and MSNBC