was taking a nap. All those reports I filled out drained me. I woke up weeks later feeling like I was enchanted or something. Some brassy sounds waft through my room. It sounded li

with outdated software. A cucumber inserted strategically into my left ear will perform a factory reset on my brain, and then I can download a newer frontal lobe and update my

your sovereignty in the United Nations Council, Mr. Seaman! You must desist at once!" Of course, Ms. Farts's odor was evidence enough of her participation in chemical warfare, and

"Heaven is a place on earth. You know who said that?" I would have shaken my head, but I was dead, see. Still, I said "No idea." Tediel sighed. "You've never heard of Belinda Car

become a complete recluse like Howard Hughes. He would stay alone in dark hotel rooms with tissue boxes on his feet, convinced it was the only way to keep germs away. My fans would

The pork distracts the taste buds while the spices infiltrate the TRP-V1 receptors. Washing down with water only amplifies the effect. These crimes continue in the large intestines

It turned out his cutting-edge botox injections were designed to pull one's face into a smile upon rigor mortis. This proved to be great advertising for Alamander's Implants,

battles snowplows for the thrill of it. After renovating a new home for The Avengers Hawkeye retired. He spent his last days smelling a jar of his own farts and gazing out at

furnace drew to a faint glow, and the rain continued softly in the background. With bellies full, the cats dozed off into wild dreams of

I immediately chose to advise this godlike ability. If I knew my ex would be going outside or if

futher away than the next. As to not drown in sorrow he pulled himself together and decided to forget the past and focus on the present.

had to sit down suddenly. How could he have been a pufferfish AGHFLEGHAGOO wondered. The idea is preposterous. But as AGHFLEGHAGOO it all began to make sense. That time when he'd

a time machine. And we can travel anywhere in time?

You cant just have a thank you being ruds, Just dont thank

singing the Declaration of Independence to the tune of Apple Bottom Jeans. Mack looked at me, confused, but his reaction paled in comparison to the optometrist beside him. She

werebear. Even though my speech was unintelligible to all of them, not understanding Quark,

His tight curly hair could only keep them enthralled for a certain amount of time before they grew bored. He couldn't entertain them with just his sax playing, honestly, he wasn't

Until Jennifer Magdelena Renah Eleanor Thea Anndersson went to jail. Here's how that happened.

looked at the mirror on the medicine cabinet. Sure enough, her reflection showed a hellish landscape behind her. She turned around to check but it was only the bathroom. Demons are

then a full choir of angels fly off in all directions. THey had their assignments from God: their programming too. The lo and behold there appeared a human sized dragon on the thro