Describing a cap's orientation is always from the POV of it in use. Otherwise, one might make the mistake of using a chamber pot as a chapeau. Although now mainly an ecclesiastic

If you're the snitch, you've already got me tied up. I can't do anything to you and we both know it. That makes me have to assume you're not the snitch. I suppose you might like it

Why do I have so many lights on? I am not afraid of the dark and my blindness makes their use moot. No, something else must be going on. Something I'm not privy to for some reason.

I would have worried if he did know something. Most of the time, simply knowing was half the battle. Most of the remaining 75% was showing up with some perspiration & inspiration t

The "might" about her quest had only recently entered her mind & she couldn't shake it. She had to believe she could do it, didn't she? Otherwise, what would all that suffering be

Nancy, Sluggo, and Rollo took Pee Wee and Poochie with them to the amusement park. The park owner, Fred Flintstone, and his partner/maintenance man, Barney Rubble, was unhappy to

To help me with my weakness for sweets, my parents sent me to Sugar-Free Camp…they sent my older brother to Blubberville USD, and they sent my pregnant older sister to a convent.

(WE) hold these truths…We hold (THESE) truths…We hold these (TRUTHS) to be self-evident, that rich white men have an advantage over everybody else, that they are well endowed

This is your chance, before God and Country, to tell the truth. Not your truth, not your opponents’ truth. THE TRUTH, as you lived it, and what is going on inside your heart now.

I, Darryl Phineas Johnson, of West Shanksville, Arkansas, do hereby proclaim that the following manifesto, as I writ it here on this Friday, March 15, 2019, is the true philosophy

"Emmaline, you are right to be suspicious. People are dangerous, crazy, and clever. And yes, it is inconsiderate of me to take a knee for you during peak hour in this restaurant. B

Bartharizar Prim was asleep in his brother-in-law’s hammock dreaming his hoodlum dreams again. He remembers winning the two fights he won. He doesn’t remember the others. Ok is OK.

Most of you see the image of me exposed, which hangs above my bed, as puzzling and epitomizing a depraved person unable to see the GREAT illustration of self-importance.

No matter how hard I try, I can’t get behind the “Be Best” campaign—not because I can’t comprehend its importance or that I don’t welcome the meaning, but BE BEST what? Asshole???

It is politically correct to point out your opponent’s political incorrectness, but it is politically incorrect to make fun of your opponent’s political incorrectness on Sunday.

Growing up in the third quadrant, I remember my captors being greasy blue-skinned nihilist parasites from some island nation in the South Pacific. That’s why I love mangoes.

I could lure them into my den with S & H Green Stamps, promising lavish gifts from the Far East, gifts like the Chinese Thumb Cuff and a Brybelly Wooden Chinese Checkers set.

Mazie Biggins, leader of the Sentinelese—a people from the Andaman Islands, an archipelago in the Bay of Bengal, who have violently rejected any contact with the outside world.

I 've found my new favorite snack; pickles in mustard. The idea is so obvious that I don't know why it has taken me this long to notice it. I suppose the rest of the world already

I think I just heard the Holy Roman Emperor yawn. I looked to the wings. Mozart had heard it also. He stormed off in a fit and overturning the mustard trolley. All the royal quests