That last burger is going to rip me apart from the inside. That is why it is avoiding my gaze. It doesn't want to humanize me. I was something to be gotten through. My name didn't

The new President's first act as President was to pardon his wife for killing his predecessor. By killing Orange Man she is a hero to both sides. The right has their martyr, the

His 2nd presidential action was to abolish the offices of Vice-President & the cabinet. All duties and powers of the affected offices would be assumed by Copresident, Mother Pence.

God had put President and Mother Pence in power. To go against them was to go against God's Will. The blood of the Serpent had been spilled to mark the time at hand. For nigh was

I heard about a guy over in the 34/16th dimension who was considered their greatest song writer. His name was Jick Magger. Seems his wife, Alba, cheated on him. He refused to write

Now Alba, thinking this an empty threat, was looking for a way out already. Why not raise the price of helping me out of your life? That is the message she thought she was sending.

Jick Magger's mind, though not immune to Alba's shenanigans, was busy with things in a whole new dimension. A dimension so new they hadn't come up with a name yet. Honky Tonk Lady.

Honky Tonk Lady blew Jick Magger's head and then his mind with her brown sugar sweetness. Jack Flash was her brother by another motherf&#^#er, who f&$d each of their mothers, maybe

When Jick Magger met Jack Flash, Jack was with the hurricane that raised him. The hurricane that used to be the Heavyweight Champion of the World. The one Bobby Zimmerman sings

You threw a stone out into the night and you told me to follow it until I knew what it was about. Then you left me there in the wilderness without my phone or charger or shoes. Why

Send me dead flowers by mail, COD. You'll be DOA but you just the same. Like we both knew you would. We wouldn't have it any other way unless we could. Then we would do it again.

I forgot to put roses on her grave yesterday. I didn't think about them once in the whole day. I've broken my promise to not forget. I forgot. I guess I'm free to try something new

You can't really call it lying. I really did believe in forever when I told her forever and I meant forever. It never occurred to me that my love was conditional upon her's. She

She had to be in my life even if it was only as a key bob, Sam told herself upon their their first meeting at the Satanic Church church function at the Mission Ship Society Shindig

Like an idiot I took the refund instead of keeping my ticket to a Led Zeppelin concert, now cancelled. Cancelled because Bonzo died the week before it was to take place.

You know in the movies when cars drive through a hot dog stand. That is pretty funny. That is, unless, that was your hot dog stand. Your livelihood. Who reimburses you? Bad guys?

Or consider the architect who now is being sued for how easily Batman and Spiderman traipse all over any of the buildings he designed. Making people wonder if he was the Batman.

The Dread Pirate Brucie was in the doldrums and that had him in the doldrums. A pirate with no wind is like a pirate with no parrot. "Arrr, where be yer parrot, Cap'n," the bosun

We would eat shit to show we didn't give a shit about eating shit because we were THE SHIT! Turns out, that was ill advised anywhere, let alone along the Gambeeze River. Heart of

When you're THE SHIT and you meet the shits, you realize you ain't shit. The shits level everyone. You can be a shit or you can be The Shit. the shits will bring you down as equals